Bathroom, refreshed

Thanks so much for all of your input on how to repaint our bathroom. It was SUPER helpful to consider it all, and we did end up going with an idea that Emily, my favorite design guru, provided in a comment (not to mention a flurry of follow-up emails where I asked increasingly desperate and specific questions before we finally got everything settled).

The idea was white paint below the chair rail and peacock blue above it. We went back and forth between two Benjamin Moore colors--the more muted and sophisticated Largo Teal and the brighter and more playful Surf Blue. Side by side, I leaned toward the Largo Teal because it seemed like the safer and more polished choice, but Torsten has a THING for bright paint colors and I always, always veto him, and I did genuinely like the Surf Blue even while I was a little nervous about how it would look as a paint color, so I kind of felt like... if I'm ever going to compromise on paint colors (and yes I know, it's both of our house and I can't rule the decor choices with an iron fist, but also, sometimes I'm OBJECTIVELY CORRECT and we are not painting our whole house in primary colors), half of a small bathroom seems like a good place to do that. Even though looking at the bright color side by side with the more muted color made me feel a smidge nervous (Surf Blue on the left, Largo Teal on the right):

So! We went with the Surf Blue, Torsten's bright color preference and actually? It turned out AWESOME. It isn't as bright as I was expecting, and I feel like it really works. It's not juvenile or garish at all. I don't even feel like I compromised or settled... I just straight up love it. Everyone who has come over since we painted it has exclaimed over how great it is, including people whose own home decor I really admire, so I'm feeling good about it. I also LOVE the way the lizard looks on the wall (the lizard has a few touches of peacock blue in its design, so I feel like it really works).

Now, two choices left... do we keep the current mirror (which I thought I wouldn't like but actually I like much better with the teal paint than I did with the beige) or go with something a little simpler? If simpler, I'm strongly leaning toward this one, but am undecided. And... what to hang on the big expanse of wall that is currently totally blank? All thoughts are, as always, appreciated.

Bathroom paint advice, please

OK, so, we have just made the impromptu decision to paint our main floor half-bathroom. This was unplanned because we only just finally got our handyman in to repair all the paint and drywall damage caused by the window installation, and luckily the guy who fixed and flipped our house before we bought it left all the paint he used, and it turned out that we had every paint we needed except the one for this bathroom, BUT we didn't realize that until our guy had already used a slightly off shade of beige around the window, so right now the bathroom has a two-tone look going on.

We have made no changes to this bathroom whatsoever since moving in (unless you count hanging up the ceramic lizard--eventually we will hang more stuff on the walls, when we get around to it). It has a beige paint color that we never would have selected ourselves, and the same goes for the mirror and fixtures, but we don't hate them or anything and aren't interested in spending money to replace them. But, I'm also not interested in bothering to try to paint-match the beige, which wouldn't be a sure thing anyway since we don't know anything about the paint that was used in there, and would rather spend a little more time and money (and it's not much more, since it's such a small bathroom) to make it a much nicer color.

So! Here's the bathroom in its current state. As you can see, beige paint with white trim and chair rail, white marble-ish counter top (with gray streaks) over dark brown cabinetry, weird frosted/etched mirror that is ostensibly neutral in color but has always seemed to me to have a mint green undertone, gray window blind. I had some trouble with the lighting in these so the paint color doesn't look the same in all of them, but I think the current color is most accurately represented in the close-up of the lizard.

As far as parameters, we are leaning toward a non-neutral color in the bathroom, something not overwhelming but a little bit bright and fun. Torsten in particular is a big fan of bright colored paint, and we aren't willing to do that in any of our actual big house rooms, so a bathroom seems like a good spot for something a little more fun and less neutral than the light gray that we will probably end up painting most of the rest of the house someday that is probably much further in the future than I care to consider. (Edited to add, thanks to Diane: you know how I feel about purple, but actually I think we'll do our master bath in pale purple someday, so I'm very open to non-purple colors for this bathroom.)

Also, like I said, we don't want to pay to replace fixtures or anything else in the bathroom, though I'd be willing to consider swapping out the mirror if the new color deeply exacerbated its green undertones in an ugly way. The gray blind is definitely not going anywhere since it's brand new, and ideally we'd like to keep the lizard in there as decor as well, though if it clashes horribly it can be relocated, and like I said, we'll add a few other things to the walls eventually too.

So! Please tell me your bathroom paint color opinions. What color? Bright? Dark? What colors are your own bathrooms painted, and what do you like or not like about it?

International House of Cool, round 2

My host family (well, part of it) from when I studied abroad in France in high school is currently here visiting me, and it's delightful. This is their third time visiting us (first one of my host brothers came to visit us in DC, and then my host parents and my other host brother came to our wedding) and their first time coming to Denver as their last two visits took place when we were living in DC. It's nice because for the first time we actually have a house with a guest room and so we can accommodate multiple guests (when it was just my host brother visiting, he stayed on a mattress on the floor of the living room of our apartment,--where he accidentally saw Torsten naked--and when three of them came for our wedding, they stayed at a hotel).

This time, all three of them are here at our house! They're sleeping in proper bedrooms and they have a bathroom all to themselves! We have cars, even, where we can drive them around! It's all super convenient! And it makes me feel like such a grown-up. I met them when I was 17, so I've known them for close to half my life now, and of course they saw me through all of my young adulthood, you know, dorms and apartments and visits on the cheap and so forth, and now here I am, with a house and a mortgage and a husband and two kids and a dog and multiple cars and, you know, just all very Norman Rockwell. It's a big change, but it's nice.

Anyway, long-time readers (er, VERY long-time... as what I'm about to reference happened almost EIGHT YEARS AGO my goodness) may remember that when my host brother Yohan came to visit, we started calling our apartment the International House of Cool (IHC) due to the concurrent German, French, and English that was ongoing. And now the IHC is back, but even MORE so, because now we have the kids so there's a lot more ongoing German speaking happening, plus more than one French person here so they frequently speak amongst themselves, plus I speak English with the kids and Torsten, so basically it's a huge mess of languages, which is very worldly but also very confusing, especially for those of us (Torsten, me, and the kids) who are bilingual and constantly switching back and forth.

Also, as an aside, Callum has been happily speaking only German with Torsten since we returned from Germany (before he would always try to respond in English), but the last couple days he's been trying to switch back to English. I think he's feeling overwhelmed by all the languages. I reminded him that now that he's been to Germany he speaks 4,000 German (his words) and at first he was like, "no, I only speak a little German," which is what he always used to say, but then he lit up and was like, "no, I speak 8,000 German! No, 90,000 German!" and then he said something to Torsten in German, so hopefully he just needed a little reminder...

Also, they've only been here a few days but the kids both took to them right away. My French host sister has two kids the exact same ages as ours, and it's like our kids can tell that these are people who love and understand them. Callum in particular has really taken to all of them. He can't pronounce their names so he just calls them all "the French people" and distinguishes them by the color of their clothing. He loves playing racecars with Emilien (my 16-year-old host brother) and last night he sat down on the couch with my host dad and had a cuddle. I mean. Can you even?

Also, Emilien plays baseball in France (very rare--they claim it's my influence even though he was only two when I lived with them my GOODNESS has it really been 14 years holy crap it HAS) but you can't find good baseball equipment in France and what you can find has to be ordered through a catalog so you can't try it out first, so I took them to Dick's Sporting Goods where he got himself a nice glove, bat, and helmet, plus pants and a belt, and he is extremely happy now. He was also deeply impressed by how they broke the glove in for him using their fancy steam machine. (He wants to play for the MLB eventually--which is hard from France because apparently scouts only go there once a year--but we'll see! We're taking him to see a Rockies game next week and we'll see how he feels about the MLB after that. Also, too bad the Rockies are terrible this year, like most years.)

And, they brought us all sorts of delicious forbidden French treats (sorry customs!). This isn't even all of them--there's also lots of homemade treats including jam, olive oil, lavender essence, and herbal alcohol:

Anyway, Torsten and I are working while they're here, so they've been entertaining themselves quite nicely--yesterday they took the light rail downtown and checked out the capitol, the mint, Union Station, the 16th Street Mall, and a couple of the museums, and today they drove themselves to Red Rocks to explore. This weekend I think we're going to take them to Rocky Mountain National Park, and next weekend to Colorado Springs to see Pikes Peak and Garden of the Gods. They're also going to do a three-day road trip next week to Arches National Park, Durango, and Great Sand Dunes National Park. As far as other activities, I've also suggested a day trip to Boulder. So that takes up most of their time, I think, but if they have additional free time, any thoughts from locals or people who've visited here on what in particular they should check out?

Also, I've been trying to introduce them to restaurants that serve things you can't find in France. We're going to take them to our favorite sushi place (they have sushi in France but not the fun crazy rolls you can get here), for BBQ, for Mexican, for Chinese, for top-quality burgers... what else? Any thoughts on stuff that is uniquely American that they should check out while they're here?

Jeans! And clothes more generally

So! You know how on that end of year survey most of the Internet does, one of the questions is about describing your personal fashion concept or some such? I always kind of roll my eyes at that question and give some sort of tongue-in-cheek answer (which, I'm sorry, is fully justified by the ridiculous "fashion concept" phrasing), but the thing is, I actually DO try to dress in some sort of vaguely pulled together way, most of the time, and I feel like I've come a long way in doing that over the last couple years.

Now, I'm hardly a fashion plate, uh, at all. But! I shop at places other than Old Navy and Target for my clothing, and this is a big step up, so I'm going with it. Also, I finally got the piercing in my left ear fixed, a solid 25 years after it was first done, so that now it actually functions, and the front and back align, and it doesn't close over constantly so that I have to essentially re-pierce it (and draw blood) every time I put an earring in. So! I obtained a bunch of earrings, and I wear them every day (and night, as mandated by my piercing shop for a full year after the piercing was done), and I also wear necklaces and sometimes even watches and bracelets to match, and Annika is old enough that she no longer tries to strangle me with my own jewelry, and I even got some gold stuff in addition to my safe-staple silver stuff, and so now I can... accessorize? Kind of? I'm still not a crazy over the top accessory type, or even a statement necklace type, but I do try to have at least a necklace and earrings to complement my outfits pretty much every day, and that's a big step up for me.

OK, so, back to the subject at hand, the clothing itself. The vast majority of the clothing that I own and actually like and wear regularly is from Loft, Lands' End, and Boden. You see that I've taken a step forward past Old Navy and Target, but I'm not exactly wearing couture over here. But I love, in particular, tops and dresses from Loft (my hips are too wide to fit into most of their pants), dresses from Lands' End, and pretty much everything from Boden (though they are a more recent discovery for me and I have not yet dared to try pants from them--but I don't even wear their biggest size in most tops and skirts so I'm thinking I need to bite the bullet and at least try some of their pants). In the summer I more or less live in lightweight dresses (the Lands' End fit and flare features heavily) and the occasional maxi skirt. My Olukai flip flops are my most-worn summer shoe (I'm sorry, this whole "polished" look is still a work in progress) but I have obtained a variety of flat sandals that are cute and at least somewhat practical for wearing out and about, and I try to force myself to reach for those more often. (Please note, also, that as I work from home, officewear isn't really an issue for me other than for the occasional business trip, so my wardrobe is by and large very casual.)

You'll notice that what's missing from the above is pants. Jeans, specifically. I... well, even though I kind of feel like today's current fashions are very reminiscent of the eighties in tone, and I suspect that in 10-15 years we will look back at photos of ourselves in these clothes and cringe, I kind of love a lot of the current fashions, particularly in jeans. I have fully embraced the skinny jean (it allows us to show off all our cute shoes and boots! I am on board with this!) and also the colored jean. I had a pair of red jeans from Old Navy about a year ago that are sadly now too big, and since then I have no been able to find a decent-fitting pair of colored jeans. Also, jeans are the only thing that I still buy at Old Navy. I wear their rockstar super skinny jeans and like them a lot, for what they are. They fit well, they are affordable, they are available in lots of washes... and they are cheap, and they start to sag and stretch quite quickly after purchase. Because they are so cheap, this is not a big deal because they can quickly be replaced, but you know what I would really like? Jeans that are actually of decent quality.

I've been holding off on doing this for a couple reasons. One, between my lap-band and two pregnancies, my weight has been quite in flux for the last few years, and it has made me hesitate on investing real money into a pair of jeans that might not fit for all that long. Two, and relatedly, I am very very pear shaped, so while I can usually pull off straight-size tops (see above re my love of Loft) and even skirts if they aren't cut too straight, the same is not true of pants. So I was afraid that even if I decided to invest in a couple pairs of high-quality designer jeans, I wouldn't find any that fit me properly.

But recently, well. I'm pretty close to my pre-pregnancy weight at this point, and while the weight loss continues, it is slow and steady, and also, it takes me a lot of pounds (like, well over 20) to lose a dress size, so even if I shrink out of my jeans eventually, it will be a slow process, and in the meantime I've spent a lot of years wearing crappy cheap jeans while waiting to be a small enough size to justify something nicer, and I'm sick of it. I want good jeans! And damn it, I'm going to invest in some. I did poke around Nordstrom (another newly beloved store for me) and was surprised to find that their plus size jeans selection was sorely (SORELY) lacking--some Not Your Daughter's Jeans and... that's it--so I'm thinking I'm going to need to figure out an alternative. Like, what brand should I be looking for, and where should I be looking for it? Friends have made a few recommendations to start me off (Paige and Kut from the Kloth--though I'm not convinced I'd fit into the size 34 from Paige and also it seems to be rarer than unicorn dust to actually FIND a size 34 from Paige even though it theoretically exists--and Kut from the Kloth has plus sizes but the selection appears quite limited in terms of both color and style) but that is as far as I've gotten.

So! I'm on a mission! Find myself some decent jeans! Just one pair, for now! I'm somewhere in the range of a size 18-20 in pants, which sadly means I'm just slightly sized out of most straight-sized lines of jeans, which typically end at a 16. But if you know of any that, say, run big? Or make plus sizes? Or that you've heard good things about? Or have ideas about stores to look at to find out these things (this is where I thought Nordstrom would come through for me, only to be sadly disappointed)? I am all ears. Tell me about your jeans!

Big girl room

Recently Torsten has been suggesting that we think about moving Annika out of her crib sooner than later. Since she is very good at independent play, he is thinking that if she can get out of bed by herself in the mornings and is in a childproofed room, she might be happy and play on her own for awhile before disturbing us, which would be lovely on the weekends (and this did happen with Callum so it's not totally unreasonable). However, she's only 19 months old--we moved Callum a couple months after he turned two--and up til now she's been perfectly happy in her crib, so I wasn't in any kind of rush to make the switch.

However, that timeline may have just gotten expedited, because in the last couple days, she's started doing this:

Now, lifting her leg onto the crib rail isn't the same as actual climbing out, which requires significant additional strength and flexibility, BUT I recall distinctly that with Callum it was none too long between when he started doing that with his foot and when we first heard the telltale thud of him landing (on his feet, thankfully) on the floor next to his crib one morning. And Annika is much more nimble and willing to take risks than Callum ever was. We could probably troubleshoot our way around this--Jonna suggested, in a genius manner telling of her own personal experience with this issue, turning our crib around so the high side faces out and putting it in a corner so there's only one short side, and attaching very stiff cardboard to said short side--and if she starts climbing out before we have another bed available for her, we may do that--but I think she has a personality that could handle a big girl bed, so I don't see a reason not to do that instead of trying to thwart her will and keep her in her crib for longer.

So! Unexpectedly, I am thinking about her big girl room. Our plan is, and has been for awhile, to move her into the room that is currently Torsten's office and make that her permanent bedroom. It's bigger than the nursery and offers a lot more options for furniture configuration. That also allows me to start with a clean slate when it comes to decor. Nobody will be surprised to hear that purple will figure heavily--but actually, I am not thinking that we will paint the walls purple. I browsed through a TON of photos of purple rooms online and out of all of them, there were only a couple that hit the sweet spot of a lovely muted pale purple that wasn't overwhelming or excessively childish, and frankly, I don't trust our ability to select a paint color that will give that same feeling. Plus if the walls were purple that would limit my ability to go with purple accessories without creating a bordello feel.

So! I'm thinking light gray walls and then lots of purple accessories--curtains/blinds (conveniently, since we haven't ordered our blinds yet, we can switch one of them from the planned gray to a nice purple), artwork, bedding, rug, even some furniture. Basically a similar concept to Callum's room except a lighter gray on the walls and both light and dark purples instead of blue and orange. I have not been able to find an inspiration photo online that exactly sums up what I'm picturing (though I've started a Pinterest board of photos that have useful elements), but this one comes the closest (as far as color scheme only as it is not at ALL the style I'm envisioning for the room--but it nicely shows off the light gray walls complemented by purple accessories):

One big question we are mulling over is whether to get a bunk bed or not. Annika and Callum have their own rooms and we like it that way and plan to keep it so, but it would be nice if they could share a room if they wanted, or if we needed them to if we had lots of guests (which has happened a couple times), and also it would be convenient for sleepovers when they're older. However, Annika has shown herself to be something of a climber, at least compared to Callum (she's not like Liz's Reagan, though, let's be clear). So, the bunk bed would certainly need to be babyproof, or at least not have a ladder for her to climb up. Right now I'm leaning toward getting a cheap-ish IKEA bed (like this one, the same that Callum has) for now and then switching out to a bunk bed in a few years when she is more rational and less of a menace to herself, or at least getting a bunk bed where you can remove the ladder or potentially hold off on installing the top bunk for awhile. I was looking at the bunk bed that it seems half the internet has, but a) it's out of stock in white and it has to be white to match the furniture we already have, and b) I want the bottom to be a full and I'm dubious about the extension kit this one has to make that happen.

Anyway, we aren't fully decided on this, so please weigh in! Do you have bunk beds for your kids? At what age did you get them? Are there any babyproofing tricks and tips for them? Do you think they're a terrible idea? I want to hear all opinions on this matter, please and thank you.

1984

We recently bought an IP cam for Callum's room to replace our dying (and crappy) video monitor. It's awesome in a ton of ways. In fact, we had wanted one when we originally got the video monitor, but at the time we didn't have iPhones or iPads and we wanted something portable, not something that required a laptop to check, so we went with the traditional monitor.

(My, how things have changed in just two years, huh?)

Anyway, the IP cam is amazing. It has awesome resolution. We can see when his eyes are open at night. We can see exactly where he is and what he is doing. It's just so much clearer than the video monitor, and therefore much more useful.

The video monitor--for us--wasn't really necessary when Callum was a baby. He was just a lump and there was nothing to see. But now that he's a toddler, it's incredibly useful. Especially now that he's not sleeping in a crib anymore and can get out of bed on his own, it's extremely helpful to be able to see what he's doing.

Which leads me to my next point... we are basically spying on him. Which we always have been doing, but it feels like more, somehow, because a) we can see a lot better, and b) he's older and has a bit more autonomy. I mean, it's not like he's doing private things that we shouldn't be watching. But it feels more invasive now than it did a year ago.

The biggest thing, though, that really makes me feel like Big Brother is that we can talk to him over the camera, and as far as I can tell, he thinks that the Voice that Issues Forth is some sort of Omniscient Being that Must Be Obeyed.

Which is great. GREAT. When he hops out of bed at naptime and romps around the room, we can get on the mic and tell him to get in bed and go to sleep... AND HE DOES. If we went to his room to tell him that, we would get nowhere. But over the camera? IMMEDIATE OBEDIENCE. It's a little scary, really.

Also, at first only Torsten talked over the camera mic, and then one time he wasn't there and I did it and Callum burst into tears. He obeyed and lay down in bed, but he was crying for Mommy. So I got on the mic again and told him that everything was OK and he didn't need to cry. And he stopped. And went to sleep. For two hours. It was magical.

BUT when I went into his room to get him up after his nap, the SECOND I cracked open the door to the room he pointed right at the camera and said "Woman! Woman not sleeping!"

So it clearly made an impression, is my point. And also, he definitely doesn't seem to understand that the voices coming over the mic are Mommy and Daddy and not some scary third-party observer/authority. Which seems to work in our favor, as far as getting him to do things that we would like him to do, like stop throwing a party and go to sleep. But it makes me feel bad! The poor kid! He seriously must feel like he's living in 1984. I actually tried to explain to him that it's just Mommy and Daddy talking to him, but I don't think he quite grasped that.

So! Effective parenting technique, apparently, but also maybe a little cruel? But it's not like I'm going to stop using it. Though that brings me to another question... when DO we stop using it? Not just the mic but the whole camera? I can only assume that over the next year or two, it will become even more interesting and useful to watch him on the camera. But at some point he WILL need privacy, or at least the awareness that he has a space to himself that isn't being monitored. And I'm starting to think that it may not be immediately obvious to us when we've reached that point.

What about you? People who use video monitors, when are you planning to stop? (Or when did you stop, if your kids are a little older?)

Family photos and to-do lists

Things are a little crazy right now. We are leaving for Europe in a week and a half and there are so many logistics to sort out before then. I haven't even thought about packing or anything like that. I did get an additional $200 out of Lufthansa by calling their Director of Communications, who put me in touch with their Head of Customer Relations, so the rental car is booked and that piece of the travel puzzle is in place, thank goodness.

But ugh, everything going on. Work is insane. I have a final project due for school on Monday that I haven't started yet. We are enrolling Callum in part-time daycare, which brings along with it a variety of headaches, agonies, and existential crises (and is deserving of its own post, which I will hopefully write one day). I haven't finished my holiday shopping. I think we may be skipping our own little family Christmas entirely at this point, though I am still optimistic that we will manage to pull off some kind of Chanukah celebration. Our car is due for its annual license plate renewal, which you can normally do online but for some reason they say they don't have our insurance information on file, so I have to actually go to the DMV. I'd like to get a photo of Callum with Santa again this year, but who knows if or when that will happen. Oh and I also want to do some Googling for tips on helping toddlers deal with jet lag due to major time differences. Or if you guys have tips, I'd love to hear them.

Every time I cross something off my to-do list it seems like I have to add two more things. But hey, my priorities are clearly in order because our holiday cards are sent and holiday cookies have been baked (though not yet delivered to neighbors... hopefully this evening). And speaking of holiday cards, we did family photos with our same lovely photographer again this year, and they were as amazing as always. If you live in the Denver area and are looking for a photographer for any reason, I cannot recommend Kristy highly enough. She is incredibly talented, and consistently so, so you can always trust that her photos will be awesome, even if the weather sucked or your kid was grumpy, etc. And she's also just a really nice person.

Anyway! Photos! Here are some of my favorites, and you can check out the full set here.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

On rereading books

What I want to know today is: do you reread books?

To answer my own question: Yes. I do. And I love it. I reread all sorts of books. Anything that I liked, I want to read again. Some are books from childhood, some are more recent. Some are quality literature and some are chick lit. I've read the Anne of Green Gables series countless times. Same with Bridget Jones's Diary. Same with most Marian Keyes books. Same with Jane Austen.

When I was living in France I only had two English books with me and I read them over and over and over. As a result I could practically recite passages from Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris.

I've always been this way. I love reading some childhood classics like The Agony of Alice and the Anastasia Krupnik series and pretty much anything by Judy Blume. I still love those books and will happily read them. But it drove my mom crazy when I was younger because I would read books that were too young for me and that I'd read a million times before rather than reading new things that were at an appropriate reading level.

It never gets old. I can read a book 10 times and still come across a nuance or subtle joke that I'd never noticed before. Also even when I've read the book a million times and know exactly how it ends, I still am tempted to skip to the end to get to the good part. For example, when I read Anne of the Island I always want to skip past the part where Anne repeatedly snubs Gilbert and get to the part where they get engaged. Even though I KNOW it's coming. I am ridiculous.

Torsten is the total opposite. He never rereads books, ever, and I don't understand it at all. I feel like he's missing out on so much by not getting the pleasure of reading a book where he already knows the storyline and can absorb more of the details and nuances that he might have missed during the first reading. But I know a lot of people feel the same way as him.

So tell me, do you reread books? If so, do you do it a lot like me or only occasionally? And whether you reread books or not, what are your reasons?

Toddler eating battles

Callum was a great eater until he hit about 13 months old. He ate everything: fruit, meat, cheese, vegetables, grains. If we put it on his high chair tray, he would stuff it in his mouth. See?



Side note: when looking for that photo, I found this photo, and then I died:



Back on topic: I don't remember exactly when it changed. I remember when we went to PJs@TJ's, he borrowed Penny's high chair and ate a bunch of foods that he'd never tried before--but I remember also that he threw some of it on the floor, which was new behavior at the time. So I'm pretty sure it started sometime around then.

He spent the next few months eating... pretty much nothing except the occasional carb. By March, when Elizabeth came to visit, he was in full-on not eating mode. It was specifically frustrating since Hannah is such a fantastic eater. We watched her stuff her face with chicken and lima beans while Callum threw literally every single food item we offered him directly on the floor.

For awhile we tried offering him a million food items in a row. If he threw one thing on the floor we'd be there with the next. We tried ignoring, scolding, keeping the dog out of the room during meals, reacting, not reacting. We tried water during meals and no water during meals. We tried offering a million options and only offering one option. We tried feeding him and letting him feed himself. He just. Did not. Want. To eat.

So... we gave up the battle. I did some research and embraced the following philosophy: eat it, don't eat it, don't talk about it. In other words, as his parents, we can control when he eats and what he eats. He can control whether he eats and how much he eats. And I was not interested in making it into a stressful battle. So, we started just putting him in his high chair at meals, giving him some of whatever we were eating, and then he could do what he wanted with it. We wouldn't give him much, because what he usually wanted to do was throw the food on the floor. And when he did that, we didn't react in any way. We kept the dog out of the room so she couldn't react either. And when mealtime was done, it was done. No other food, no milk, nothing. Just, he ate or he didn't eat and then the meal was over.

We were lucky that he is so big--we didn't have to worry about him failing to thrive or anything. In fact, while he wasn't gaining much weight he was growing length-wise, quite quickly. But I didn't really see a correlation between his eating habits and his weight gain. He tapered off significantly by 7 months, and by 9 months even more so. In fact, in the year since then, he has only gained maybe 3-4 pounds, but he's grown about six inches.

Eventually his eating habits improved somewhat. I couldn't name a date when it happened, so it must have been a gradual thing. It helped that he now always eats with a spoon or a fork--he seems to like that much more than eating with his hands. He still has a strong preference for carbs, and will consistently eat quinoa, pasta, rice, bread. We've found ways to incorporate fat and protein into those--quesadillas with cheese, bread with hummus or peanut butter, etc. He is a big fan of yogurt. Sometimes he'll eat bananas and not other times. He almost always picks the vegetables out of his food and hands them to us while saying "all done." He does love those pouches of pureed fruits and veggies, and they are so outrageously expensive that we don't give them to him often, but sadly he won't eat purees on a spoon or in any other format. I think basically he just likes to drink a lot more than he likes to eat and the pouches feel like drinking to him. (And no he doesn't like smoothies in a sippy cup, sadly.)

One thing he does like is soup. I have discovered that we can get him to eat almost anything if it's in soup form, including solid chunks of meat and vegetables. Of course the one food that he can't feed himself is the one he likes most of all, but I'm not complaining. (Really it's probably the salt that attracts him, but I'm trying not to complain about that either especially as his diet is generally minimally processed and low in sodium.) But if we're ever at a restaurant and one of us has soup, he will say that he's all done with his own food (even if it's mac and cheese, his usual favorite) and practically dive out of his high chair trying to get our soup while saying, "This? Soup? THIS? SOUP?" repeatedly until we start feeding him spoonfuls of it.

So! I guess I'm on the hunt for soup recipes, is my point. And maybe also someone with the patience for spoon-feeding a nearly-two-year-old. Or maybe I should just blend up chunky soups and put them in a sippy cup for him to deal with on his own.

Generally, though, even though he's not a super avid eater, things have improved immensely. And I think a huge part of it is our hands-off philosophy. It might not have gotten him to eat better, at least not right away, but it DID save our sanity, and that's equally important. At least when your one-year-old is over 30 pounds.

What about you guys? Have you had issues getting your toddlers to eat? Any tips, tricks, approaches, foods that worked especially well? Or things that didn't work at all?

Holiday cards + Tiny Prints giveaway

This is a sponsored post. Tiny Prints is giving me a credit toward my holiday card order to write this post. They've also provided me a giveaway for a reader.

We did our annual family photos about a week ago (with the same amazing photographer we used for last year's family photos and for our maternity photos) and while I wait impatiently to see the images, I've been perusing the Tiny Prints website to start narrowing down the holiday cards I like.

First of all, here is the card we sent out last year:

Now. What I learned last year is that it is totally futile to try to pick a design using a stand-in photo, because the composition and coloring of the final photo selection will be totally different. So this year I didn't even bother with that. I just went straight for the card designs I liked best, and once we get the images from our photographer then that will definitely inform the final choice of design.

As far as parameters: I want something that is not religious or holiday-specific, as we ourselves are a mixed holiday couple and our friends and family celebrate all different combinations of holidays. I like flat cards, preferably, but not necessarily, rectangular. I don't like our last name to be enormously prominent. I generally like designs with just one big photo on the front, especially because Tiny Prints lets you put two small photos on the back, which we did last year, in part because our front photo didn't feature Montana and in part because we had so many amazing photos of just Callum that we had to share at least one:

Beyond that, all I want is something visually appealing and not too hokey. So. Here are the designs I'm leaning toward this year. It seems like they break down into a few basic categories.

Language or design/color scheme that isn't overtly Christmas-y, but still invokes Christmas:

Structured for family news, which makes me feel awkward/I don't know what I would write, but I'd love to get this kind of newsy card from other people so maybe I should get over myself:

Basic wintry:

Anyway. Soon enough we'll have our photos and then I can actually make a choice! And order the cards! And send them out! And then it will really feel like the holiday season has begun.

In the meantime, Tiny Prints is offering a giveaway for one reader: $50 off your holiday card order. To enter, leave a comment here by Friday night and I'll pick a winner at random. And if you're interested in ordering from Tiny Prints whether you win a giveaway or not, check out their special offers page.

And here's a comment prompt for people who want to enter the contest: tell me about your holiday card habits. Do you send one out most years? Does it have a photo? How do you normally display the holiday cards you receive?

A shopping mindset

I haven't posted in a few days because Sandy has been consuming everyone, myself included even though I'm nicely landlocked and far away from the storm and the weather here has been beautiful, but it felt wrong to be posting other stuff when my Twitter stream is full of damaged houses and displaced people. But... well, gotta get back to it, right? And what better topic to start with than the deeply serious topic of shopping? But seriously, to my East Coast friends, here's hoping that your power comes back soon and the damage is minimal and your insurance companies and landlords are cooperative. I'm so glad that you're all safe.

So, on the shopping thing. I... don't do it much. I used to do it a lot more, and then Torsten quit his job and we buckled down on our budget and I stopped shopping pretty much entirely. But then, after awhile, I wasn't the sole breadwinner anymore but... I just didn't quite pick up the shopping bug again. And I think that's for the best. I think that time we spent on one income was a really good wake-up call for us on what things are worth spending money on for us (high-quality groceries, travel, our house) and what things we didn't actually miss (tons of meals out, new clothes).

But every now and then I do realize that I need something specific, and I go to the mall and I walk around and look at the stores and try things on and it's kind of great. It used to be that whenever there was something specific I was looking for, I was pretty much guaranteed that I wouldn't find it. And I'm sure I'll run into that luck again soon. But my two most recent trips to the mall have been shockingly successful. First I went looking for boots and skinny jeans, and actually found both, AND I didn't buy anything else at the mall, despite browsing pretty much every store there, so I consider that a win. And then, more recently, I decided I wanted a nice, warm winter sweater and I went to the mall and found one almost immediately (at Banana Republic, where I almost didn't bother looking because I never used to fit into their stuff and I forget that now sometimes I actually do, and also it was on sale so extra win).

Of course, that second trip I did actually buy a few things I wasn't on a mission for, including a couple shirts for Callum and a Christmas gift for my mom and a shirt for myself, but you know what the nice thing is when you don't shop very often? You don't feel bad about a few unplanned purchases because they are such a rare occurrence.

There's something about shopping that's very addictive. Blogging makes this worse. You look at all these photos of people in these nice clothes and you see the latest fashions and you start to think that maybe you should revamp your wardrobe, too. And then you go to the mall and all the stores are so appealing and everyone is so friendly and it's so relaxing, at least if your husband has stayed home with the baby so there's nobody to whine or complain (and yes I'm referring to both husband and baby in this particular instance; if anything I think Torsten is more likely to whine while shopping than Callum is). And you find yourself just... coveting. At least, I find myself coveting and I assume I'm not the only one, given how many bag-laden people I pass at the mall.

I've gotten pretty good at resisting the urge to give in to my coveting. I'm good at analyzing whether I really LOVE something, whether I'll really get a lot of use out of it, or whether I just think I like it because it's shiny and different. And I'm also pretty good at accepting it if I do determine that I love something and will wear it regularly. I can buy it, assuming the price is reasonable, without massive amounts of guilt. I don't sneak shopping bags into the house so that Torsten won't see.

But... two trips to the mall and I can see the mindset coming back. I saw all this nice jewelry at the mall and started realizing that I have never been great at accessorizing, and even less so since having Callum since he grabs at everything, and thinking that now that he's older that's something I'd like to start doing more of, and shouldn't I start looking for good jewelry? Which, of course, would necessitate another trip to the mall on a jewelry mission. But at what point are you just manufacturing shopping missions because you're just in a buying kind of mood, and you want more stuff?

I'm not a minimalist. I do care a lot about experiences and will pay for them, but I've also found that there are certain things, the kind of things that a lot of bloggers sneer at, that I do care about and that do enhance my daily life. I'm OK with that. I don't see a problem with enjoying shopping, as long as you exercise restraint and do it within your means. But still... somehow I'm just seeing that shopping can be a mindset, and it's one that I used to be in, and then I wasn't anymore, and now I can see how easy it would be to go back to that mindset. And I wouldn't mind going somewhat back into it. Not shopping at all when we were on a single income? Sucked. A lot. But hopefully the experience, in the long run, will help me find some middle ground, and not just be some temporary blip.

So what about you? Do you shop often? What stuff do you think is worth the money? Do you feel like there's a mindset behind being a frequent shopper, and if so, do you think you're in that mindset?

How do I decide how to vote?

Despite the fact that this post is about voting, I swear it isn't actually going to be about politics. It really is procedural. Because voting is really HARD. And I don't mean the actual act of voting (especially because Colorado allows mail-in voting). I mean deciding what and who to vote for.

Some of the decisions are really obvious. President, for example. My vote there is quite decided (and has been for awhile). Representative too (I adore Diana DeGette). Colorado doesn't have a Senate race this year, but in years past I've been quite informed about those elections as well, and certain about my preferred candidate.

It's the smaller races that make it so difficult. The local elections, and the amendments. And specifically, the judges. There are SO MANY judges. And they aren't competing against each other! The question on the ballot is just whether they should be retained. A separate question for each judge, approximately 17 million questions in total. (OK, maybe I'm exaggerating a little. But it's a lot!)

The amendments are the most difficult. The city of Denver does this awesome thing (do other cities do this too? I don't recall receiving anything like this when I was registered to vote in DC or in North Carolina) where they send out a booklet summarizing all the local ballot initiatives, what they're proposing, and the comments for and against them. Sometimes I can read the comments and tell where I fall on an issue (for example, there's a question about campaign finance reform on this year's ballot and phew, I could tell where I fall between arguments about corporate influence and arguments about money being the equivalent of free speech). But some of them are much harder to parse, because I don't know the context. And, the Denver booklet only addresses the pros and cons of local ballot initiatives, not statewide, so I'm on my own for the state amendments anyway.

And sometimes it's a question of more than just whether I generally agree with an issue: it's about the details of the proposal. For example, there's a ballot measure about legalizing marijuana this year. Generally speaking, I think it's silly for marijuana to be illegal, and I think the state could really do with the tax revenue. But do I understand the issue deeply enough to be able to read the amendment and figure out if I think the proposed approach is the right way to deal with this issue? No. The Denver Post helps by publishing editorials on most of the topics, but I don't fully trust the Denver Post, since I don't often agree with its political endorsements, particularly at the local level (I'm still really annoyed over their endorsements in last year's school board race). And I have yet to find a comprehensive local organization with which I share most or all of my political stances. So I end up having to cobble together a ton of research from a million different sources and often STILL don't really know how I feel about an issue.

It just seems crazy, you know? I am an educated, politically engaged voter, with clear stances on most issues and the desire and ability to do a lot of research. I think I am a pretty good example of an informed voter. And yet, the more I inform myself, the less informed I feel. And given that a lot of voters are not known for being super informed, I wonder how everyone else is making their decisions. Do they all know something I don't? Am I not tapped in enough to the political process? Why does it take me hours and hours of agonizing research and analysis to even start to come to a decision about over half the questions on my ballot? And, given the huge effort required for me to cast an informed vote, how helpful are these votes to begin with? What does the outcome mean? Do we really think every voter spent the time required to really understand the issues and stances and proposals on the ballot and cast an informed vote based on that understanding? Or are most people's votes based on bias and incomplete information? I mean, I'm doing tons of research and I still feel like my ballot is a hodge-podge of partisan half-understandings.

And the judges! Can someone please explain to me what I'm supposed to do about the judges? The thing that drives me the craziest is that they're basically impossible to research, because there is very little information available about them. So what is supposed to happen? Am I supposed to quickly Google their names to ensure there isn't some sort of major scandal or concern making the news about them, and assuming not, vote to retain them? Am I supposed to dig up information on all of them, and if so, where and how? Am I supposed to just assume that they're all fine and vote to retain them because I don't want to put someone out of a job? If this is what people mean when they talk about how important it is that judges are elected, I'm not impressed. I don't see how the vote to retain these judges could possibly be meaningful in any way. But maybe I'm totally misunderstanding how it's supposed to work.

But one way or another, it's going to take me from now until Election Day to figure out how I'm going to vote.

Hung up

Apparently I'm going to have to make some slight revisions to our fall plans. The first time I suggested apple picking to Torsten it seems that he didn't take me seriously, but when I mentioned it again he was rather incredulous. Turns out that starting from the age of four (according to him) he was forced to spend entire weekends from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. (according to him) picking apples in his grandparents' orchard, and it was miserable and difficult and as a result he hates picking apples. Plus, as he pointed out, I don't even like apples.

I tried to tell him that this could be a way of erasing the childhood trauma! We can jaunt over to the orchard, spend a few minutes picking a solitary bag of apples, drink some apple cider, pet the animals, and leave! And it would be magical and healing and he would have fond memories of how apple picking can actually be fun! But he wasn't having it. And he's right, I don't like apples (except Granny Smith). So. We're crossing that one off the list.

(The boots are still awesome, though. And the requested fall weather has totally arrived and we are loving it. And we WILL do the pumpkin patch. So, the fall plans are not a total fail.)

Unrelatedly, Callum has started making truck noises, and you guys, it's so cute. I think he's trying to say "vroom" and he does it with cars and trucks and trains, though he sometimes does yell "choo choo" when he's playing with his trains. The truck noises may be one of my very favorite things he does right now:



Also, almost 21 months is my new favorite age. He listens so much better. He eats with utensils. He talks constantly and he's working on combining two words and it feels like we're really close to him being able to full-on talk, in sentences, so that we can understand what he's saying. He dispenses hugs and his eyes are just so expressive. I was thinking recently about how I don't really start to recognize Callum in his baby photos until about 2-3 months, and I think it's because that's when you start being able to see his personality in his eyes. His hair is the thing that people comment on most (because it IS red and beautiful), but his eyes are what really stand out to me. I never really believed all that crap about eyes being windows to the soul, etc., but his Callum-ness just radiates out through his. Maybe it's because he's young and guileless, and maybe it will change as he gets older, but right now you can read him through his eyes, and I think it's amazing.

(As an update: he still has a cold but he's stopped wheezing and we haven't needed the albuterol in days.)

So, since we're talking about childhood hangups (or any kind of hangup), tell me: is there something that most people love to do that you can't stand? And if so, is it because of some traumatizing past experience, or just because you think the rest of the world is crazy?

Toddlers are people, too. I think.

Well. We are in North Carolina at my parents' house and... it's raining. And humid. I mean, even when it's not raining, it's humid. Yesterday I commented on how humid it was and my mom said "oh it's not that humid today" and checked their weather center and the humidity was 80%. HA. In Denver normal humidity is like 20%. My hair is THRILLED that we live in Denver now. It is not so thrilled that we are back in the humidity at the moment.

The weather was sunny and mild yesterday despite the humidity, so we headed over to Pullen Park, which has a little train and a circa-1911 carousel and pedal boats and a little boat ride for kids, in addition to an awesome playground setup and lots of grassy open space. My mom says she remembers taking me and my sister and our cousins there approximately 23 years ago. It must be such a weird feeling to take your grandchildren to places that you remember taking your own children.

Anyway, Callum did well despite the fact that he accidentally rubbed sunscreen in his eyes on the car ride over and spent the rest of the drive screaming bloody murder while his eyes turned all pink and puffy and we tried helplessly to flush them out with water.

It's funny--I think of him as a happy, chortling, smiling little guy, usually with this impish sparkle in his eye and a gleeful look on his face, but watching him try new things, he is a perfect mirror of myself as a child--quiet, absorbed, and very, very serious. He laughed when he was on the slide and the swing, but when we did the train and the carousel he was very focused and didn't even crack a smile. But, you could tell that he was enjoying himself--he was just not in his usual relaxed element. He was in a new place with new people and lots of strangers, doing something different and unusual and he was taking it all in and focusing intently, and that left no time to relax or smile. EXACTLY like me as a kid.

I wonder sometimes what it's like in a toddler's head, where things happen to them and are done to them all the time with no explanation, or at least not one that they can fully absorb. We were at home and everything was normal and then we got on a plane and then we got off the plane and it was humid and his grandparents were there and then he was at a house he hasn't been to since Christmas and probably doesn't remember, and there were dogs he's not used to and everything was different, and then we took him to restaurants and parks and a million places he's never seen before. And this is what his whole life is like, constantly going places and doing things that he doesn't really know about or understand. And he just rolls with it. All toddlers just roll with it. That's their sense of their lives--that's the natural order of things for them. They are used to just being picked up and carted around and taken random strange places where they see random strange people and they are expected to like it. We saw a kid yesterday crying and refusing to go to the carousel and the parents were uselessly repeating, "But you'll like the carousel if you just try it."

And it's true, I'm sure that kid would have liked the carousel, but it's just funny because our kids have to take our word on all this stuff, we are constantly trying to get them to do things and eat things because they will like them, or at least we think they should like them. Our promises are all they have to go on and considering how often they get dragged to do things they don't really enjoy, like being stuck in the car for ages or getting a shot at a doctor's visit, I'm not surprised that our empty promises of how they'll really like the thing we're trying to get them to do sometimes falls on deaf ears.

I guess when I think about it this way, tantrums make so much sense. I know little kids like to have choices and I know that tantrums are a developmentally appropriate step toward asserting preferences and independence. When I think about all the ways in which those things are routinely ignored in little kids' lives just by dint of the way everyone's lives are structured and the difficulty of communicating complicated concepts to such new little people (it's so easy to forget that two years ago Callum wasn't even HERE yet... he's not a baby but he's still so NEW), it's not surprising at all that dammit, sometimes they just want the BLUE cup and NOT the red cup, and they're willing to throw themselves on the floor to kick and scream about it if they have to.

Not earth-shattering, something parents and child development experts have always known, but it just makes so much SENSE to me to think about it that way, and helps me not get annoyed and instead try to validate Callum's feelings when he has a tantrum or gets really upset about something that seems ridiculous to me.

And really, this kid is so very good at going with the flow. Even if he's very serious while doing it.

What things have your kids done that have surprised you in this way? Do you ever look at your kids and realize that they are doing something or acting in a way that isn't really in line with your general assessment of their personality?

Family portraits and holiday card help

A few weeks ago we headed out to the foothills to have family photos taken by the same amazing photographer who did our maternity photos back in December. It was chilly and gray, sadly, but we had a great time and the photos still turned out amazing. Seriously, Kristy is my favorite photographer ever. I have never liked so many photos of myself, ever. She is just that talented. And super nice and really affordable too. I cannot recommend her highly enough for anyone in Colorado looking to get pictures taken, no matter the occasion. I am thinking maybe we'll make pictures with her an annual thing? Which would be an awesome way to document our family and also get some holiday card-worthy pictures in the bargain.

So, a few days ago she posted some teaser pictures on her blog, and then yesterday the disc with all the high-res images arrived in the mail, so now! Now we have so many to choose from! And by "choose from" I mean "for our holiday card."

Here are some (OK, a lot) of my favorites (some holiday card contenders, some not at all right for that):













And then the full set is here (and when I say full, I mean full).

So, what do you think? Do any of the photos stand out to you as particularly excellent holiday card candidates?

Baby gear we would do differently

When I was pregnant and trying to figure out what baby stuff to get, it felt like the big trend was for people to say, "Only first-time moms buy stuff ahead of time. You don't need anything! Don't waste your money!" And while I appreciate the sentiment behind that (wipe warmer? Not necessary), I didn't find it helpful. Because despite the people chirping, "You don't need a crib! The baby will sleep with you! You don't need a stroller! That's what your arms are for!" I DID want a crib and a stroller. And a swing. And a glider. And a bunch of other stuff. And you know what? When the baby came, I was GLAD I had the stuff.

(The swing, by the way, was the number one thing that people said not to buy ahead of time. The baby might hate it! It costs so much! Just get one later if you need it! But I decided to take the risk on the swing, figuring that even if Callum hated it, the next baby might like it, and if not, since I bought it used on Craigslist, I could probably resell it and make most of my money back. And you know what? Callum DID like the swing, and we used it SO MUCH, and you know what I'm really glad I wasn't doing two days postpartum on one hour of sleep? Rushing out to Target to pay full price for an inferior quality swing because I was desperate.)

Anyway. My point is, I carefully researched baby products and purchased only what I thought we would actually need and use. And we made the executive decision to only buy things that we thought we would need right away. High chair? Bouncy seat? Jumperoo? All things that could (and did) wait. But Callum slept in his crib from his first day home. He napped in his swing. He bathed in his tub. And so on. All that stuff that we bought ahead of time? We used every single item. And I was really glad we had it.

All this is just a really long intro to say, if you're an expecting parent thinking you don't need all that junk? Great. Don't buy it. I'm sure you're right. But if you're thinking you DO need all that junk, and you WOULD like to have it, and now you're wondering if you're just being silly and naive to buy it? I don't think so. I mean, make careful choices, do your research, and only buy what you think will make sense for you, while of course understanding that some things might work better than others for your particular baby. But don't feel like you're being a ridiculous first-timer by getting stuff ahead of time. People's instincts are usually pretty accurate as far as what they think will fit into their lives and what won't be necessary. So if you think something will be useful and you want to have it? Buy it. We did, and I'm so glad.

Now. All that said, there ARE a few things that we learned from experience were not perfectly suited to us. Things that we actually ended up doing changing after a few months of experimenting. This still doesn't mean that the way we originally did things wouldn't work for a lot of people. But the lessons we learned are, I think, worth sharing.

1. Stroller.
We started with the Chicco Cortina stroller, which was purchased in a travel system along with the Chicco Keyfit 30 car seat. The travel system was so steeply discounted that it was almost the same price as the car seat alone. Since car seats should not be purchased used anyway, we were going to have to pay full price for it, so the sale price of the travel system made the stroller nearly free. And we used it for ages. And we liked it a lot. We still do, actually. It has great suspension. The car seat fits into it. It has a regular seat that reclines fully. It has an adjustable handle. It has a giant, accessible storage basket and lots of cup holders. It's awesome.

And it's also HUGE. It fills the entire trunk of our car. Even our SUV. It is FANTASTIC for around the neighborhood, but it is not so great for around town. So then we purchased an umbrella stroller to keep in the trunk (well, we put it on our registry and received it as a gift). It's the First Years Ignite, and I think of it as a compromise stroller. It's lighter and folds down relatively small, but it's still not super tiny and weightless. It has a sunshade, but not a huge one. It has decently high handles but Torsten (at 6'4") still has to bend a bit to push it. It's pretty sturdy but it's not great on dirt trails and hikes. It has a basket, but it's not very accessible. The seat reclines, but not all the way. So, it does a lot and as an umbrella stroller it's great. But we still prefer the Chicco, if only it didn't take up our entire trunk.

Enter the CityMini. We actually decided to get this when we got our SUV, because Montana rides in the back of the SUV, and there wasn't room for both her and the Chicco stroller back there, which meant that the umbrella stroller was our only option, which wasn't very helpful when we wanted to go on a hike. So I did a bunch of research and decided to splash out on a more expensive stroller that does everything at once. It's lightweight. It folds up small (and with one hand). It has big wheels and good suspension. The handle is high. The sunshade is huge. It's incredibly maneuverable. The seat reclines very far. And, for our next kid (since Callum has already outgrown his infant seat, rendering this a moot point for him), we can get a converter that allows us to fit the car seat into it.

Basically, I love this stroller. It is totally worth the money to me to have one stroller that does everything and fits in our car. We leave it in our trunk and we keep the Chicco set up in our garage for neighborhood walks. But it would also be great as a one-and-only stroller, as long as you don't mind taking it in and out of the car. And I think we'll donate our umbrella stroller to a battered women's shelter or something.

2. Dresser.
Sadly, when I was pregnant our Ikea hadn't opened yet. So we selected a simple dresser from Land of Nod, which my parents gave to us as a Christmas gift. We got a (fantastic) non-skid changing pad to put on top of it and ta-da! Changing table. And for a long time it worked great. The changing pad took up nearly the entire dresser, but we squished wipes and lotion on the end of it, and we keep our diapers in a basket next to the dresser anyway, so it was fine. But then Callum got bigger. And squirmier. And suddenly every diaper change involved wrestling toiletries away from him while listening to constant crashes as he knocked whatever he hadn't grabbed on the floor.

Conveniently, our Ikea finally opened at just around that time. So we purchased this dresser. See how long it is? It is GLORIOUS. Callum can kick and roll and grab to his heart's content, and nothing gets knocked over. Plus there's room for everything we want to keep on there, even a lamp! And bonus: more drawers for clothing. So, the old dresser is in the bedroom that currently serves as my office, and will be put back into service once Callum is potty trained and graduates to a big-kid bedroom.

3. Diaper bag.
When I was pregnant, I read a bunch of diaper bag reviews and selected the Skip Hop Duo. A sale and a coupon allowed me to buy it for cheap at Macy's, which is convenient because we don't use it anymore. There isn't really anything wrong with it--though it's a bit narrow, which can make it hard to find things in the main compartment--but it was a pain to carry. It does have nice stroller clips, but when you just want to grab the bag and the baby? It was a little unwieldy. I probably would have stuck with it, but Torsten really hated it. So I bought him an Eddie Bauer backpack-style diaper bag for Father's Day, and now we both always use that one. It's just so nice to be able to put it on your back instead of having it weigh you down on one side and swing around clunkily while you're trying to wrangle a baby. The Skip Hop has been retired (though I did transfer its changing pad into the Eddie Bauer, since I found the Eddie Bauer changing pad inferior). Maybe I'll donate the Skip Hop to a shelter with the stroller, now that I think about it.

4. High chair.
Originally we purchased a Fisher Price high chair/booster seat combo instead of a more traditional seat. And I still think it's a great concept. So cheap! So easy! So compact! Straps right onto your dining room chair! And the reasons that this didn't work out for us are very specific to our particular baby and furniture. We have nice microsuede dining chairs that we did not want the baby eating (and spilling) on. So we put the seat on one of our old wooden Ikea dining chairs that was very compact and lightweight, with straight up and down legs. And our child is very large, and very squirmy. And the combination of these factors meant that Callum would bounce around during meals and rock his chair right off two of its legs in a terrifying manner. It seemed like it was only a matter of time before he managed to tip the chair over entirely and land on his head with a chair and booster seat on top of him. So we splashed out for a more traditional high chair, the Graco Contempo. And it works great. It's comfortable. It's nice. It's easy to clean. And best of all, it's sturdy. Callum can bounce in there with all his might, but that thing is not going anywhere.

So, those are the main things we've learned and changed as we've dealt with a real baby instead of just a theoretical one over the past nine months. (And by the way, Amazon Affiliates isn't allowed in Colorado so I don't benefit from people clicking those links--they're there purely for reference.)

So now it's your turn. What are some things that seemed great at first, but wound up just not working for you and your baby? And what did you end up doing (or what would you do next time) instead?