Thursday, May 22, 2008

AND my throat still hurts.

Yesterday I had my pre-op appointment with the doctor who will be performing my parathyroid surgery. He was, as I expected, very nice, and the resident who was with him was sporting a HUGE diamond on her left hand, so she and I had a brief chat about being engaged. The doctor's assistant was very friendly and saved me cab fare, although she was not the most efficient person I'd ever met (more on that later).

So yes, everyone was nice. I didn't have to wait long to see the doctor. Everything went according to the best-case scenario plan: the doctor confirmed that I can have the minimally invasive surgery (although there's always a chance that more than just the one gland is affected, in which case he would have to make a bigger incision mid-surgery to find the other sources of the problem). It's a 23-hour observation period, which means my insurance will be billed only for an outpatient procedure even though I will most likely spend the night at the hospital. It's under general anesthesia, which means I don't have to sit there awake while someone roots around inside my neck.

So, yes, good. But even though I vowed that this year would be the year that I stopped being scared of doctors? (And that was a nice piece of clairvoyance, wasn't it? Since I had no idea, at the time, that I'd be seeing so much of various doctors this year?) And I have been largely successful at achieving that goal. I'm not scared of doctors because my health has become an open book so I'm no longer scared of what I'll find out. And that is great.

But still. Despite all that? And despite the fact that this visit to the surgeon had the best possible outcome, given what I already knew, which was that I did need surgery? Hi, my name is Jess and I get upset when things that I KNEW were inevitable come true.

The meeting with the doctor himself was fine, and he was knowledgeable and friendly and answered all my questions, and then he dropped me off with his assistant to schedule my surgery. Incidentally, he and I talked it over and I decided to go ahead with the surgery now, before the wedding, because by the time the wedding gets here the scar will have faded considerably, and I'd rather just have this done with and not have to think about it.

Anyway. Off topic again. But my point is, when I went in to schedule the surgery, the assistant asked me whether I'd prefer July or August, and I was surprised, because the doctor had said June and August is not very far from the wedding at all. So I said that I'd like to have it earlier, as soon as possible, and then she told me okay, June 10. And I was pleased with that, and reconciled myself to it, and then she said oh no, actually, July 1.

Except that I told that story all wrong, because when you read it? Ha ha, it almost sounds like it was a BRIEF conversation. Like, you know, two minutes. But actually? It was forty-five. Because when I went into her office, she was on a personal call, and she smiled at me and motioned for me to sit down, and then continued her personal call for FIFTEEN MINUTES while I sat there awkwardly. Then she FINALLY hung up and I thought we'd get on with it, but then she started organizing some files on her desk. Then her phone rang and she spent five minutes chatting on it. Then she started asking me about dates, but before we could get very far, a resident stopped in and they had another five-minute conversation. Then the phone rang again. And so on and so forth, until finally, FORTY-FIVE nerve-shredding minutes later, I was informed that July 1 was the earliest possible date.

I swear, I almost cried! Over a three-week difference! By the time the 45 minutes had gone by (and I am NOT exaggerating on that time estimate; if anything, I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt that it was under an hour), I was not feeling equipped to cope with the fact that this surgery wasn't going to go exactly according to my internal plan. Plus, we were going to go out of town for the July 4th long weekend, and if I'm recovering from surgery, that won't be possible, but I don't want to put the surgery off anymore, because July 1 is only four months out from the wedding, and that already makes me a tad uncomfortable. And plus the doctor said June, he said JUNE I SWEAR HE SAID JUNE so even though July 1 is only a day after June, DAMMIT HE SAID JUNE AND THAT'S WHAT I WAS EXPECTING.

Anyway, my look of horror and tragedy must have made the assistant feel bad, because she promised to try to move a couple of things around to free up the doctor's calendar for the June 10 date that she originally promised me. She even told me there was a "good chance" that it would work out that way. And that's the hope that I'm clinging to because JULY IS SO FAR AWAY, and also SO CLOSE TO THE WEDDING.

And I couldn't even be that mad at her for taking so long and stressing me out so much, because she was so friendly, and when she noticed on my form the name of my company, she told me that her daughter used to work there, and then she told me that there was a free shuttle from the hospital almost directly to my office, thus saving me the cab fare home, and she actually walked me all the way out to the shuttle stop so that I wouldn't get lost. Because she was very sweet, you see. Just vastly inefficient, and not so good at the prioritizing of the client in her office over the friend on the phone.

Anyway, despite everyone's niceness, and the relative success of the appointment, all things considered, I was GRUMPY for hours afterward. Like, seriously edgy and pissed. And the mood didn't lift until I finished the proposal I was working on and dropped the final copy at the director's desk. After that, I finally started to feel better. And now I'm still a tad annoyed about the whole thing, but overall feeling more balanced and less infuriated.

So, roll on July 1. Or June 10. Fingers crossed.

30 comments:

  1. Oh, I am sorry that you had to go through all of that just to hear that it might not work out as planned. You took that very nicely, because even though she was a nice worker, after about 30 minutes, I wouldn't have cared. One bit. If I'd heard she was on the phone with her friend, you can guarantee that someone would have heard about that. Because even 5 extra minutes is too long.

    Anyway, enough of my rant. I do hope that everything turns out well for you. . . you're definitely in my thoughts. Stay strong (cheezy, I know, but seriously), I know you can do it :)

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  2. You know, she does seem nice BUT I find it doctors' offices' disregard for their patients' time completely unacceptable. I get nervous enough in the 25 minutes I spend sitting in a paper jonny waiting for a pap smear or waiting for my endocrynologist (sp?) to test my reflexes. I can't imagine waiting for a doctor while you may be truly ill. I could talk for hours about health care in our country. Let's move to Europe.

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  3. I know that after all of this hassle and hullabaloo the surgery will go off without a hitch and the scarring will be minimal! :)

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  4. I don't know if anyone else has brought it up to you, but if you're concerned about the scar? I've heard really good things about Mederma. It's a cream that you apply to the scar that is supposed to make it heal more quickly and not be as noticeable. Check that out- hopefully that will calm some of your scar-in-a-wedding-dress fears.

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  5. Ugh- 45 minutes waiting? That's in poor taste, especially with her on the phone right in front of you.

    Here's seriously hoping for that June 12 date to open up!

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  6. Wow, 45 minutes would kill me! Especially if I could see the woman chatting away in front of me. I've got my fingers crossed for you for June 10, a mere 19 days away!

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  7. i'm glad she ended up being so nice and all, but SERIOUSLY that is pretty heinously inconsiderate and inappropriate and i would have been WAY PISSED as well (except probably would have burst into tears instead of getting mad, which i hate, but that's another story).

    when do you find out if they can swing june 10?

    fyi, i used mederma after i had foot surgery, and it really does help make the scar softer and more fade-y. it's a cheap over-the-counter cream, TOTALLY worth investing in for a little peace of mind!

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  8. It's good that you made it clear you wanted the earlier June date, and also, how rude to make you wait? Yesterday I drove by a dentist's office and his sign said, "Taking Care of Cowards Since 1987". Ha!

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  9. How frustrating! :( Fingers crossed for an earlier date.

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  10. Fingers crossed for the June 10 date! I know everything will be fine. We tend to make a bigger deal in our head then what it turns out to be. Just breathe, I know it'll be fine!

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  11. I've got my fingers crossed for June 10th for you! :)

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  12. Here's hoping for the earlier date and a quick recovery.

    And what the hell was it about yesterday? I don't think ANYONE I talked to was in a good mood (and I'm still considering taking a few heads for my collection, so evidently it still isn't over...for me.)

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  13. I think in your shoes I would've been equally annoyed.. however, I'm glad to hear that it will be minimalistic.

    I wish you the best with it, regardless.

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  14. Ack. Even though you were expecting to need surgery, talking it through and scheduling it just make it so much more REAL. I don't think that's abnormal fear of doctors at all!

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  15. Even though she was totally nice about everything, it sounds SUPER ANNOYING just reading about it. Which means it had to be so much worse to actually experience it. I'd still be irritated too.

    It drives me crazy when people have no concept of how their actions are wasting other people's time. It is rude at best, and in this case it was downright unprofessional.

    Keeping fingers crossed for June 10th!

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  16. Ugh. What hoops to jump through when you're already talking about scary surgery! I'm sorry. It will all work out well, though. It always does - whether it's June or July. You're in my thoughts!

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  17. Dealing with medical staff can be a nightmare and a half. Deep breaths. I am pulling for you to get your June date!

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  18. I'm sorry you have to go through all this. SUCKS! Especially when you have a wedding to plan as well. I wish you the best of luck with it. I know it will work out. I like to think good things happen to good people.

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  19. So sorry!!!

    I am hoping for June so you can get it out of the way!

    Hang in there!

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  20. It would almost have been better if she'd been an unmitigated bitch. Conflicted feelings are tougher to deal with.

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  21. GAH. I would hate to not know exactly when I was going to have a surgery. My SIL has to have open freaking heart surgery. And they scheduled it for SIX MONTHS after she found out. I can't imagine...

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  22. Fingers crossed! I HATE inefficient people. I'd get teary, too!

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  23. Fingers crossed for you!

    I hear you on the grumpy thing - I can not shake this bad mood I've been in all week.

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  24. All things medical make me edgy. I break out into a sweat just taking the LG in for well-child visits. It's ridiculous....so I'm glad you're getting over it.

    Here's to bumped up surgery dates and super-fast healing of scars!!

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  25. I totally would have bitched that woman out. That's totally rude to keep interrupting a meeting with a client.

    I am not afraid of docs or anything, but I think I would have been a little shaken by the dates being so far apart, not even if one of them was up against a Big Important Date like that.

    While I'm sure that the July 1 date will still be okay in terms of healing and such, here's hoping June 10 works out.

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  26. Wow? Personal calls at work when customers are waiting? UNACCEPTABLE. Definitely in my top 5 pet peeves.

    I'm so glad everything looks best case scenario with your surgery! Yay!

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  27. sending june 10th positive vibes your way!!!

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  28. Sorry to hear things didnt go as planned. You have to be cordial but make sure you stay firm. My mother has been through numerous surgeries the past few years with multiple issues and she finally learned that you have to put those docs in their place sometimes!

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  29. For next time, pull out your cell phone and call the doctor's office. When she answers, say, "Hello, I need to schedule a surgery." When she looks at you, smile and wave. Forty-five minutes is ridiculous.

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  30. I mean the next time you have an unnecessary wait like that, for whatever reason. I made it sound like you're going in for multiple surgeries.

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