Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Dress dress dress

OH HI. Remember that one time (okay, yesterday), when I was all like, WHERE IS MY WEDDING DRESS? Well, as it turned out, I got my answer the same day! I called the store on the suggestion of one of my commenters and was told that it had a ship date (from the manufacturer) of June 23, which meant it would probably arrive in the store a week or two after that. And I totally was NOT grumpy about that, and felt good about having an actual date.

But then, yesterday afternoon? My phone rang? And oh, it was nobody really, just the store, saying they thought I'd like to know that my dress came in that day! They have it in their hot little hands, just WAITING for me to come in and pick it up this weekend. After I try it on, of course. Because as some of you may remember, I haven't tried my dress on yet, because the sample in the store was too small for me. And I am SO. EXCITED. To finally get to wear my own wedding dress, the actual dress that I will wear on the day that I get married.

Bizarrely, though, I suddenly feel nervous. I mean, I haven't tried on my own dress. And I haven't seen the dress for months. So even though I KNOW that it will suit me, and I KNOW that it will fit, and I KNOW that it's the perfect dress, those things are all in my head, and my head is obviously not in charge of my nerves.

And also, this means that this weekend will be the first time that I will see myself looking more or less how I'm going to look on my actual wedding day. They say you cry when that happens. I cry sometimes, but not that often, and not usually over sentimental stuff. I am more likely to get goosebumps over sentimental things. I'll bring my camera, but I still haven't decided if I want to actually post pictures of me in the dress before the wedding. I'll have to decide after the fact.

Wow. I just can't get over the fact that my dress is really here! I know it's just a big white dress, but it makes the whole idea of the wedding day so REAL. Just thinking about wearing that dress makes me think about the moment when Torsten and I will see each other for the first time, and how amazing that will be. We're going to do it before the ceremony, in part because it saves time and prevents us from leaving our guests hanging for an hour. But also because those are going to be excited, nervous moments full of anticipation and happiness, and I can't imagine anyone I would rather spend that time with than Torsten.

We decided a long time ago that we wanted to see each other before the ceremony. From what I hear, the actual walk down the aisle can be kind of a blur, and I want to have time to take each other in beforehand, and experience this amazing day together. We'll have a private moment when we see each other for the first time, and I have no doubt that it will be beautiful, and also help keep me grounded for the rest of the day.

Recently, though, I'd been reading all these wedding blog posts about how glad people were that they waited until the ceremony to see each other, and how it was the best decision they'd ever made, etc. And I got so into that mindset that I started thinking that oh, maybe it was bad to sacrifice that moment just for the sake of practicality. And I forgot all about the other reasons, the sentimental reasons we had discussed, the wanting to share that time together.

And then S mentioned how seeing her husband before the ceremony was the best decision ever, and suddenly all of the reasons why we wanted to do that came flooding back, and now I'm really happy with our decision. And also, apparently very susceptible to the opinions of other bloggers. Who would have thought?

In other news... oh, wait. THERE IS NO OTHER NEWS. I can hardly sit still, I'm so excited about my dress. My only question is HOW AM I POSSIBLY GOING TO WAIT FOR THE WEEKEND? I'm just not quite sure I won't combust beforehand.

60 comments:

  1. YAY for wedding dress arrival. :) You know, I didn't cry when I tried mine one...I just thought "I look Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooood".....of course, I divorced the wasband...maybe I'll cry next time. ;)

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  2. EEEEEE!

    I think seeing each other beforehand is a great idea, especially if you are more private people who prefer to keep that moment between the two of you. I know that's how I feel.

    Did I say EEEEEEEE yet?

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  3. YAY! I am happy for you.
    I did NOT see Conrad beforehand. It was worth it to see his face when my dad and I came around the corner. He said he thought he was going to start crying .... I saw him last at the rehearsal dinner the night before- I stayed at a hotel the night before and I wouldn't even take his phone calls the day of ... It was well worth it!
    Of course, it could have been some weird southern tradition too... who kmows.

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  4. YAY! And just think, it's already Wednesday - so you're halfway there!

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  5. Oh my god this is such a wonderful thing! I loved when my dress came in, and I am anxiously awaiting my fitting on the 2nd... its so crazy how all these things are happening for us, and so FAST!! :) Its going to be wonderful, enjoy it!

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  6. Want to hear something funny? I got a postcard from my shop saying MY DRESS HAS ARRIVED, too. And like you, I'm really nervous to try it on. Mostly because my sales lady threatened me as I ordered - you cannot gain any weight, otherwise this dress will not fit. WTF?!?!? And seeing your groom before the ceremony? Me, too! It'll be a very intimate moment shared by our families and wedding party. That's it. You can't replace that. Ever!

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  7. that's so exciting! i remember trying mine on for the first time -- i felt like it wasn't me in the mirror. :)

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  8. YAY!!! That is so exciting! I hope the next few days go by quickly for you!

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  9. And you know what...walking down the aisle will still be special. You'll see him at the end of the aisle surrounded by all the people that love you!
    Yay, for the dress arrival. Do you have your (purple) shoes yet? Be sure to take them with you if you do.

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  10. Yay for your dress coming! Woohoo! Don't let anyone fool you...the whole day is a blur...well at least mine was. All I remember really was having a blast!

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  11. We did most of our pictures before the wedding, so not seeing each other before would have been tough. :)

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  12. I am so excited for you! They say when you try on the dress for the first time, it all become that much more real. I can't wait to hear about it!

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  13. Yay for wedding dress!

    I think a lot of times people are happy with the decision they made. But I think a lot of times, people who are NOT happy with the decision they made will say even more vehemently that they ARE.

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  14. If I were you, I wouldn't post the pictures. Even though I'd love to see them!

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  15. So exciting!! Of course I would LOVE to see pictures (I think everyone would) but perhaps by keeping descriptions to text only it will help make your moment with Torsten more intimate? As much as we all love the Internet (and the friends that live in the Internet) I wonder about the repercussions of not sharing that kind of a moment--the visual of you in your wedding dress--with Torsten first. Maybe it will make everything more magical and fantastic to wait and share it with him for the first time? Or not. Feel free to take this comment with a BIG grain of salt. :o)

    xox

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  16. How exciting for you!

    I think it would be lovely to see each other before the wedding. Let the love of your life be the first to see you. That sounds perfect to me.

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  17. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

    hee, the "should i see him before the walk down the aisle" debate sounds like the "should i have sex with him before the wedding" argument, if you take out the pertinant words. "i'm so glad we waited - it made the moment THAT MUCH MORE SPECIAL!" :-)

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  18. Ooooh, YAAAAAYYY!!! I cannot wait to read the post where you tell us how GORGEOUS you look in your dress!!

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  19. You're such a tease! We won't be able to see pictures of you in your dress for months :)

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  20. oh my gosh i'm so excited for you!! i didn't cry when i tried on my dress in the store, but i definitely felt gorgeous in it. and i tried it on every day until the wedding. that's how excited i was :) joe and i didn't see each other before the wedding, but i can see the positives of both. it would be nice to have a private moment with just the two of you, but i'm glad we did it the way we did. he said he teared up seeing me walking down the aisle with my dad. :)

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  21. Yea, that is so exciting!!!

    You sound like you are over the moon!

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  22. How exciting! Don't you dare reveal pictures of the dress before the wedding. As much as I'd love to see them, I would much prefer to see the wedding dress with the wedding hair and makeup and flowers. Keep us guessing!

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  23. That is SO EXCITING that you get to try on your dress this weekend!!!!!

    I think its a great idea to see him beforehand, to have that intimate moment. I have a feeling when you walk down the aisle it'll still be just as special, just as emotional, as if you hadn't seen him before.

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  24. I never cried about my dress, but that doesn't mean you won't.

    H and I saw each other before our wedding. He was really adamant that we should not see each other, and I told him tough luck, we're doing pictures beforehand. And then on the day of the wedding, he kept trying to see me even before the arranged meeting time. It was really nice to see each other beforehand and to have it be more private and to kind of get used to it before the actual ceremony. But I know people who have waited and have been happy with that decision too, so whatever!

    Also, I vote that you don't share pictures of you in the dress before the wedding. Keep it a secret! It's more fun that way. To me. You should really do whatever you want.

    Ok, I think that's enough rambling.

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  25. Oh, by the way, even though we saw each other before the ceremony, I still totally cried the whole way down the aisle, and H still teared up.

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  26. Wheeeee! So glad the dress is in and it's just a few short days before you get to try it on for the first time!

    I never even thought of the practicalities of seeing each other before and doing the pics beforehand, but I know that I am very susceptible to the ideas and opinions of others (which is why my house and car buying plans are so hard to make).

    Back to the dress though: yay! I hope you do show us a sneak peek of the dress but I'm also content to wait till we see the wedding pics!

    (I think)

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  27. That's so exciting that your dress came in! I didn't cry when I tried mine on, I just really loved the way it looked.

    T and I are going to see each other before the ceremony too. I like that we will have a private moment for just the two of us.

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  28. Sooo, Jess... any news about your dress???

    Awesome news, and what a relief. I think your decision to see each other before hand is a great one.

    I can't wait to see pictures. You're gonna be gorgeous!

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  29. That's pretty exciting. I hope you cry when you try it on and then tell us all about it. :)

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  30. YAY!!!! DRESS!!!! YAY!!!!! When mine came in, and I put it on with the bustier and the big slip, I was so like "OMG, this is really happening!!!"

    I agree with the private moment. To the horror of my mother and Maid of Honor, I slept at home in bed with Hub the night before our wedding. Why sleep anywhere else? We wished each other "happy wedding day" before I left to get ready at 6:30am and also spoke on the phone just before the ceremony started. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

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  31. I had nightmares about my dress until the wedding day - that my house burned down with it in it, that it didn't fit... it's normal to be nervous!

    We saw each other before the wedding, to do photos. It was totally fine, and I'm happy we did it. We aren't really that big on tradition though... ;)

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  32. YAY for the dress! I didn't cry when I tried mine on, but I'm not overly sentimental either.

    I was DEAD SET on not seeing each other before, and now I regret it. It was so windy at the ceremony that we have no "beautiful hair" pictures of the two of us. It was also hard to get pictures done with all of our guests milling around waiting for us after the ceremony. So my vote is to do it before.

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  33. Oh yeah, he was a big ball of nerves before the ceremony, and I regret not seeing him before, giving him a huge hug, and telling him everything would be perfect.

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  34. Hahahaha "In other news... oh, wait. THERE IS NO OTHER NEWS."

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  35. you don't cry?
    I cry at like, uh, everything...
    all the time...

    OK, i will take one for the team.
    Got a camera phone?
    take a pic, send to me, and I will cry for you, cause OMG YOUR WEDDING DRESS IS HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

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  36. SO if you don't post your pictures, can you email some to me?

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  37. How exciting for you! While I had a wedding dress, I wasn't in love with it and felt that it was "good enough." I never got to go try on dresses and pick the perfect one for me. And it is the only regret I have about the wedding.

    So, I am a little jealous, but mostly glad that you get to have the experience.

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  38. YAY!!! Adam and I saw each other before the ceremony too, and I loved it. Also, we walked down the aisle together since my dad passed away and I didn't want to choose between my mom and brothers. It was a very good way to get all the ohmygoodness-ness out of the way before we were expected to say our vows and share the moment with PEOPLE. :D

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  39. Also, why do I seem to be the only unmarried person here? Hmmm...

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  40. My friends who have had a private moment pre-aisle-walk have had a really special experience. I don't know which I'd prefer.

    Can't wait for photos of you in the dress... whether it's next week or after the ceremony!

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  41. Catherine... you're not the only unmarried one here. :)

    Jess, I'm so glad you got your dress! I hope that it's everything you remembered and more. And I don't think it matters whether you see Torsten before the ceremony or at it... there's still going to be that initial glimpse of you in your dress, and whether it happens before or at the ceremony, it still happens, right?

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  42. aw yay for your wedding dress, that's so exciting!

    and i'm still torn for my future (very future) wedding whether or not to see each other before the ceremony. but i hear that it helps so much with everything and you get to share that initial moment together. so yay for you and torsten! :)

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  43. Oh.. congrats, what a happy time!

    I have a really weird relationship with my dad, and so my husband and I actually walked down the aisle together, instead of me being "given" away... and I have to say, I would not have traded him holding my hand as we walked down the aisle for ANYTHING. Seeing or not seeing, you have to do what you feel is right!!!

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  44. my husband and i actually walked down the aisle together. he was very nervous but he said he would have been more nervous just standing at the alter by himself. plus his mother was about 20 minutes late so we just laughed and hung out together in the back of the church w/my sister(moh) and his bff (best man). believe it or not i was very calm and i still remember how happy i was to walk down the aisle w/him like it was yesterday even though it was almost 15 years ago.

    congratulations.

    jeb

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  45. Ahmygod!
    Exciting! Why didn't you run to the store that instant and demand to try it on? I would have.

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  46. Oh my goodness, so exciting! I remember how thrilling it was to finally try on my dress. Enjoy it, hon! And take pictures! (not to necessarily share now, but for you to look back at later!) :)

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  47. Wow I got little flutters for you, for some reason. YAY DRESS!

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  48. Oh, I'm so excited for you!!

    Add me to the list of couples who saw each other before the wedding. We took photos then, so we could spend more time with our guests.

    It was a magical, misty morning and our photographer captured some beautiful shots. And we both still swelled with pride when we saw each other as I walked down the aisle.

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  49. That is so exciting about the dress. I would not be able to wait to try it on!

    I think that's a bold idea about seeing each other before the ceremony. I don't know anyone who has done that yet so good for you! I like that idea.

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  50. Hooray for your dress!!

    And this post made me giggle, as I have come to a realization as of late...

    No matter what the decision, every bride, for every wedding, will always say that EVERYTHING is the best decision she ever made (except perhaps for the DJ who spent more time on the roof smoking than inside playing music), because hello! It's your wedding! You're going to spend the entire day blissed out on endorphins and seratonin... how could *anything* seem like a bad idea?

    That being said, I'm sure that your decision is the right one for you. Every bride's got her style, after all...

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  51. Phew! It's here! I didn't cry either when I finally tried on My Dress. I was excited, sure, but no tears. I kept standing there looking in the mirror in the fitting room....giddy...and waiting for these supposed tears to come. Nope.

    So....unless they've done it both ways, how can someone say that seeing their spouse/not seeing their spouse pre-wedding was the best decision they ever made? I'm puzzled.

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  52. ooo! Dress! I hope you had fun, or if you haven't tried it on yet, I hope you haVE fun.

    We didn't see each other before the ceremony, and it was good that way, but I don't really have anything to compare it to - I mean, you're either one way or the other. So there's really no "best" way - it's the only way YOU know about. I think seeing each other for the first time, regardless of circumstances is what is really the best thing.

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  53. Great news - I hope your dress moments are magical!

    I saw this great shot.. where the bride and groom were standing on either side of the door, not looking at each other but holding hands - and the photographer was taking a picture directly in line with the door. It is hard to explain, but shows them both parallel to each other, without them seeing it.

    Gorgeous!

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