I have been dying of excitement all week because today is the day that one of my closest friends in the world arrives for a (tragically short) visit. I've
mentioned her before, because she's my other bridesmaid, along with my best friend (plus my sister as the maid of honor). And she is pretty much the last of my friends that Torsten has never met. Is it weird that the two he met last also happen to be my two bridesmaids? I can't help it that they don't live near me!
Anyway, we were talking about my friend Pia. We met at age 19 when we were both camp counselors, and we've been very close friends ever since, despite long periods of not seeing each other (and the one that will come to an end tonight is the longest yet at just over two years). To celebrate our reunion, we have the following activities planned:
- Going to see the cherry blossoms, which will be the first time for both of us
- Shopping for a bridesmaid dress
- Talking for hours
Okay, so maybe it's not much in terms of activities. But we don't need that kind of planning. Our friendship is comprised more of moments. I think of Pia in terms of phone conversations and short snippets--me parallel parking her mother's car on Central Park West when her mother was having trouble doing it; myriad trips to Target that always included the purchase of Sour Patch watermelons; late-night conversations about boys and dates and unfortunate exes; plotting to get back at fellow counselors who played jokes on us; getting incredibly sunburned at the beach; an amazing Ben Folds concert up in Virginia followed by a three a.m. drive back to North Carolina in a torrential downpour; her and my mom chatting for hours; and me staying in her dorm room when her classes had already started but I was still on winter break and keeping her up for hours talking.
Our history is like a film reel of amazing, full-color memories and I can't wait to add more to the list. Including the wedding, of course, but also including this weekend. I can't wait to see her. I'm not the squeeing type, but if I were, I'd totally be doing it now.
So tell me, do you have friends that you hardly ever get to see? How does that affect your friendship?
my absolute best friend in the entire world lives in cbus, and i live in boston. due to crazy work schedules and bank balances, i haven't been able to see her in over a year...but funny enough, we talk on the phone all the time, so its like nothing has changed.
ReplyDeletewe just have to put more effort into keeping up our friendship. which is done via care packages, cards, and midnight phone calls, if need be.
i actually just called her on my drive home last night and we talked for an hour...i really miss her.
i hope you have a blast with your friend. :)
xo, b
(p.s. thankyou for voting!!! jorie WON!)
It's so good to have close friends like that. Even if you don't see each other all the time or talk all the time, you know they are still close to you. I've got quite a few who live far from here (US, Europe, Lebanon). Amazingly enough, we're still close and pick up were we left off. One of them is coming to visit next weekend all the way from sunny California. I hope the cherry blossoms will still be out because I'm planning to take her to see them too! Enjoy! :)
ReplyDeleteThat's so exciting that your friend is coming - I hope you have a great time! And it turns out that my greatest friend is probably someone I've never even met in person, but talked to, in some capacity, every day for the past four plus years. I heart the internets!
ReplyDeleteall my best girl friends from high school live nowhere near me, so it's really hard. but no matter how much time passes between phone calls it seems like we can always pick up right where we left off.
ReplyDeleteand there's one, jenn, that i talk to nearly every day.
have fun tonight!!
AW that is so wonderful! I just got so happy for you readin that! I love my friends that i dont get to see too often, it always makes the visits 100% better and tons more fun! Have a great time and share pics!
ReplyDeletemy best friend and i have never lived full-time in the same city, except for the one summer when we met, when we worked together at the same program. but like michelle said- you can just pick up where you left off with great friends- and the internet/cheap long distance through cell phones has helped, too.
ReplyDeleteSo many, sigh. Most of my friends are still in college about 2 hours from here which isn't bad at all, but I don't get to see them very often.
ReplyDeleteOne of my best friends lives in NC and another is in the service so I never get to see him. It's depressing :-(
My best friend, Kristina, and I see each other like three times a year because we have such conflicting schedules. But we talk on the phone fairly often and are both good about e-mail, so it's not like we have to catch up on news when we get to see each other; we just spend the whole time ganging up on JG and laughing at things he doesn't understand. Ah, so fun.
ReplyDeleteThat's great you finally get to see Pia after such a long time. To me, the best friends are those with whom we share millions of little moments instead of a few braggable nights out. Know what I mean?
ReplyDeleteAs a product of going to high school in Boston, college in North Carolina and calling Chicago home, many of my closest friends do not live near me. I have definitely lost touch with a number of people over the years. But, for those I still speak with regularly? It's worth it. Especially these days with cell phones, email and BLOGS to stay in touch!
It's hard not living near your friends. But it's gotten a lot better with cell phones and the Internet. When I was little, I moved around a lot and would eventually lose addresses. That was hard. I hope you guys will have an amazing time hanging out and catching up!
ReplyDeleteMy BFF lives about two hours away and even though it's not that far, we only see each other about every 6-8 weeks because we're both busy. Thankfully, I have another group of friends that live in the surrounding area that I can hang out with often!
ReplyDeleteI love friends like that. All my close friends from high school still live back home in Texas, so I only get to see them when I go visit once or twice a year. Even when we don't talk all the time, we always pick up right where we left off.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a great time with your friend. Will there be pictures?
Since moving from CA to WA, two of my closest friends are now far. We are lucky that our bond does not require proximity to be maintained. Actually, the distance has helped me not take them for granted. And when we do get to see one another it's always a fantastic time.
ReplyDeleteI hope you and your friend have a fabulous visit!
Aw, this made me want to call all of my friends simultaneously :)
ReplyDeleteSome of my bestest buds live in Europe so I don't get to see them often at all. It makes me sad but thank goodness for facebook, myspace, skype, IM, the internet in general. We chat all the time! I hope to see more of them this year.
ReplyDeleteI think I need to get out there and check out the Cherry Blossoms sometime in the near future too.
ReplyDeleteAlso? I have friends all around the globe.
It freaking sucks.
My friends that I feel closest to are my friends from college. Though I manage to see them occasionally (every couple of months), we only get all of us together about once a year. It makes those times more special. However, I'm kind of the glue that holds us the group together, and it makes me sad to see some of the individual friends who don't keep in touch.
ReplyDeleteHave so much fun with your friend :)
oh man, two of my best friends live in boston, and one lives in minneapolis. It's tough because we all have crazy schedules so we don't talk nearly as often as we'd like but we leave each other little notes on facebook, send emails and call when we can. It's the little things that matter when you're maintaining a friendship.
ReplyDeletehave fun this weekend with your pal! :)
Since I live so far from where I grew up, I have TONS of friends that I rarely see. But when I do, it's like no time has passed, which is the best thing about childhood/young adulthood friends if you ask me.
ReplyDeletePia! Like Pia Zadora! I love it!
My BF lives far away and is currently undergoing some scary medical stuff and I wish I could be there for her. It sucks, but sometimes the bonds stay the same despite time and distance.
ReplyDeletemy BFF from 6th grade. she lives 8hrs away and she's still in college and is in EVERYTHING so she's super busy. But when she comes home we always make time to hang out and since those times are so infrequent- there is not a silent moment between us! Our rare hangouts just make the time we do see each other that much more great. It hasn't effected our friendship at all. We know where we stand with each other :)
ReplyDeletethat's how you can tell, i think... when you can go a year without seeing someone, and pick right back up like it's only been a day.
ReplyDeletehow exciting! what a good weekend :-)
My friends don't live too far away, but we still don't see each other often enough. With 13 kids between the 5 of us, not to mention jobs, husbands, health issues for some and parent health issues for others, it's not easy to arrange get-togethers. When we do get together, though, it's like no time has passed at all. We're just so comfortable and secure in our friendship that we don't need to stay in constant touch to stay close.
ReplyDeleteHave a great time with your friend!
Oh you're going to have so much fun! These days most of my friends are far away, and I don't even know when the last time I saw my best friend was (I talk to her everyday though). Enjoy the cherry blossoms. I don't get to DC until the evening tomorrow and it's supposed to be pouring rain throughout my stay. Blech!
ReplyDeleteI met my best friend 43 years ago when we were in kindergarten and I cannot imagine not being able to see or talk to her every other day.
ReplyDeleteMy other dear friends and I met six years ago at a writing class. We clicked right away, as if we'd been friends in another lifetime and just picked up where we left off. We don't live far from each other, but we only get together once a month or so for breakfast.
All I can say is, thank goodness for e-mail.
It definitely depends on the friend. There are some friends I could not see for months, years even, but everything is where it was when we last saw each other. Then there are other friends where it takes a couple hours to get back into the swing of "us" again. Hope you have a lovely weekend!
ReplyDeletePart of growing up in Brooklyn and New Jersey, then moving to California, while befriending mostly nomadic or wanderlust-ful friends means that none of us are remotely near one another. I have a core group of friends from college who are in NJ, but even those groups have segmented, to Spain, Texas, and more. My best friends live in Philadelphia, Thailand, San Diego, New York, and New Jersey.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard. We send texts, IMs, e-mails, whatever it is we have to do to stay in touch. The ones who are out of the country are a bit more difficult to pin things down with, but when we're all together again, it somehow becomes so much better.
Thailand is coming home in August, and we're driving back across the country together. It'll be a nice way of catching up on the last year and change that we haven't seen each other, the longest we've been apart since we were born, as we grew up together.
I hardly ever see my BFF from college. It is so weird to be distant from her, but every time we see each other, it really is just picking up with old times!
ReplyDeleteMy bff lives about 2 hours from me, and while we don't see each other very often and our lives are very different, nothing has changed for us. We have been the best of friends since we were 11....almost 19 years!!
ReplyDeleteOur husbands cringe when we are together since we have a tendency to be obnoxious.
Most of my friends are long-distance since we left Boston. I have new ones in various places, but it's not the same. My girls are somewhere else.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard, but it makes me appreciate the moments we have together, and they ALL take on a golden glow, no matter how mundane.
Have fun!!
ReplyDeletecherry blossoms! i love them.
ReplyDeleteYou have an amazing trip planned. The Cherry Blossoms are my fav time of the year in DC.
ReplyDeleteWe talk on the phone once a week for at least two hours!
ReplyDeleteGo ahead and SQUEEEEEEEEE!
None of my closest friends live anywhere near me, not even within driving distance. But, as you said, with good friends you can get together every few years and it's as if no time has passed.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your visit!
I think living far away from some of my closest friends has actually HELPED us maintain the friendship. Then again, I am jaded, because after years of living in different towns, I moved to the same city as one of my best friends ever. Things were fine for the first year or so, and now we aren't friends anymore.
ReplyDeleteI'm still perplexed by this loss of friendship (I was the dumpEE, not the dumpER), and when I do ponder it, I come to the conclusion that it was largely due to the fact that our lives changed so much from when we were college friends. It's very easy to find yourself in a different life place than your friends - people get married at different times and have children at different times - and friendships don't always survive such transitions. I think being local makes it even harder because you're used to depending on each other/seeing each other often, and then when something happens to change that, well, it's just that much more prevalent of a change. (Whereas if the friend lives out of town, well, not much changes at all.) Does that make any sense?
Sorry for the ramble.
Unfortunately, all of my goodest girl pals from college live at least 2 hours away from me. Apparently, when we graduated, we thought it best to split apart and move states, if not countries, apart.
ReplyDeleteAnd I love that you don't have to actually plan anything with those kind of friends. All you need is yourselves, and you'll have a great time. I hope you have a lovely weekend with her! :)
And apparently, I wish today = Friday. Sorry 'bout that.
ReplyDeleteHaving moved around a LOT, I have friends all over the country. It's difficult sometimes because even though we're still close, there's something to be said for missing out on the trivial day to day-ness of it all.
ReplyDeleteAh, yesterday I was visited by a girlfriend I haven't seen for many years. I wish we lived in the same country.
ReplyDeleteI love how you describe your memories as a colour film reel. That has got to be good to relive!
my BFF (Meags) usually lives in Edmonton... we see each other every year at nationals for a week, and camp for a week. And we email once a month or so. She's still the person I trust most pretty much in the whole world, other than my sister, I guess. She moved to Toronto for 4 months though, so we've been seeing each other weekly. V awesome.
ReplyDeleteBut I think the best friendships can totally stand distance. It's the meek ones that need constant maintenance.
My two best girls live on the other side of the country. Bah. I don't see them very often, but whenever we do get together it's like nothings changed. I think that's how it is for kindred spirits.
ReplyDeleteI think friendships with people you hardly ever see seem to be richer because you have to put so much more effort into them. I have zero close friends out here. The closest is a few thousand miles away. All I can say is thank God for the internet!
ReplyDeleteHave an awesome visit with Pia!
I have a friend like that...we like to say that she and I were "friends in the womb" because our moms were friends when they were pregnant with us. We grew up together - same church, high school, college. Sometimes we'll go for weeks and not have a chance to talk but when we do, it's just like we talked the day before. I love that about our friendship.
ReplyDeleteEverybody should have a friend like that...I'm glad you do!
oh yah i do! and you just read the post about it (think: embarrasing pic) earlier this week!
ReplyDeleteAt this point, pretty much all of my good friends live far from me. It is definitely hard, and some of them are easier to keep in touch with through email and phone calls than others.
ReplyDeleteHope you have fun with your friend! Enjoy the cherry blossoms!
Oooh, sounds like you and Pia are going to have a great time together! Are your bridesmaids wearing different dresses?
ReplyDeleteI'm just coming to grips with the fact that one of my closest friends can still be someone who I don't see as often as other friends I'm close to. Friendships are so different and can't all follow the same pattern.
I am lucky that with the exception of a couple of friends, my closest ones live in the same city as me.
Have fun!!!
ReplyDeleteI've never been great at close friendships. A lot of my best friends are overseas now, so I try to keep in touch, but they're not BFF type friends, just buddies really..
Yea, two of my best friends are in different countries. But, we talk on the phone everyday and it works; we're still close.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing that frustrates me sometimes is that it seems as though they're not part of my life. Take the whole Man thing. I would have loved for them both to have been here.
Anyway, have a great time with your friend.. I'm so jealous! :)
Aww...I am happy that you get to see your friend, I know how that can be.
ReplyDeleteMy best friend since 3rd grade moved to Dallas when we were in 7th grade. It was so hard, we talk through e-mail and facebook, and we need to talk on the phone more often. The busy excuse always comes up and I hate that.
Also, another friend on mine, you've seen me talk about him on my blog for sure, he is from Spain and it has been almost a year and he is coming this Saturday! 2 days before my birthday!! I couldn't be happier, I may just not let go of him when I see him. It is going to be the biggest hug ever! And..I can't wait! :)