Thursday, April 15, 2010

Book club

Back in February, Chelsea sent an email out to a bunch of her Denver and Boulder friends asking if anyone wanted to start a book club. People enthusiastically agreed, and added more of their own friends to the list. We decided, via email, to alternate meeting locations between Denver and Boulder (about 45 minutes apart) each month, to host the first meeting at my house, and to read The Elegance of the Hedgehog as our first book. By the time I sent out the Evite, there were a good 25 or so people on the list, and about 15 of them attended.

It was awesome! I knew a few of them already, had been reading the blogs of a few more for years and was thrilled to put faces to names, and got to meet a big group of fantastic local women. Feelings about the book were mixed, both as a group and individually (I still don't really know what I thought of that book, over a month later). Everyone brought yummy treats, and there were copious amounts of wine. We spent maybe half an hour or so talking about the book, and the rest of the time just chatting and getting to know each other. The conversation we did have about the book was interesting and useful, but the rest of the conversation was even better.

So anyway, last night was the second meeting of the book club, up in Boulder at Doni and Ashley's place. It was awesome. Not quite as many people made it, but there were still maybe 10 of us, and a lot of us had met at the previous book club, so the conversation flowed very easily (helped by more copious amounts of wine, I'm sure). The book we had read this time was Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea, which, while a fun book, didn't lead to quite the level of conversation that the last book incited. I don't think we talked about it for more than ten minutes, total. But it was interesting to hear what the others had to say about it, and the non-book-related conversation was excellent, too. We all stayed for hours and had a great time.

The next meeting will be next month, back in Denver, at Rosie's, and we will be reading Middlesex. A few of us, myself included, have read it before, but we all remember liking it and are looking forward to reading it again. And it should provide plenty of conversation fodder, if I recall correctly. I am so excited about our next meeting!

It's just so NICE to meet a whole group of interesting, smart, friendly, fun women who all live nearby! And many of us are bloggers and/or Twitterers, so there was quite the lively discussion about social media and its role in our lives, too.

I know it only meets once a month, and it's just a book club, but it makes me feel so settled here in Denver, and so happy to have a whole group of wonderful people to talk to about interesting things. I guess there's a reason that book clubs are so popular as to be kind of cliche.

What about you? Are you in, or have you ever been in, a book club? How well did it work? How long did it last, or has it lasted? Any tips for making them successful over time?

29 comments:

  1. My book club is going strong in its 6th year- and I LOVE IT. Love. We often hardly talk about the book at all, but I love having this great group of women who I see regularly to talk about life and books and wine. When we started, none of us were married- now we almost all are married and three have kids! Wild.

    We have found that having the person hosting the meeting choose the book is a pretty good way to keep things moving and avoid long book-voting processes (we have tried several book selection methods, and "hostess choice" has worked best for us BY FAR.) Also, this year we're doing a "books I should have read in high school/college" theme, and it's been really great so far.

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  2. This is the second time in the last month I've heard someone reading Middlesex (and no, it wasn't someone else in your book club). What's up with the resurgence of this book? I read it years ago and hated it. I was one of the few...

    I was in a small book club last year that I loved. The group was diverse, we chose serious books and really delved into interesting topics. But, it fizzled after a few meetings - people were just too busy to meet.

    Now, I am part of a virtual book club ... we had our first meeting a few weeks ago and have our second meeting in May. The dynamics are slightly different when the conversation is online. And given both these book clubs do not have longevity (not yet, at least), it'd be hard for me to give any real advice.

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  3. I've been in a book club for about two and a half years and LOVE it. We take turns hosting/choosing the book and it's always a great time. Sometimes we talk about the book all night, other times we just chat about anything and everything.

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  4. Right after grad school I was in a book club (I think we read Middlesex, in fact). I loved it a lot, although I didn't really mind when it lost steam and disbanded...even though it was primarily a social occasion, the book reading got to feel like homework. When we were reading a book I wanted to read it was great, but boy, when I wasn't interested, it was misery, and felt like just another area in my life where I was slacking off.

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  5. Yay for a book club!It sounds great. I used to be in book club, now I'm in a mom's group. I guess that's part of my progression in life. LOL (Although you could of course be in both! )

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  6. I am SO glad to be doing this and love getting to know you. I know what you mean about how it helps to feel settled - I love having a regular social plan, and with SUCH inspiring and fun women. Can't wait til next time :)

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  7. I agree - this is such a sweet writeup :)

    It's really nice to be part of a book club, it's my first official one and I really enjoy the mix of people that show up and that conversation easily flows (about the book, life, blogging, wine, etc.)

    Can't wait for next months :)

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  8. Oh this just about made me cry! In my previous town I was in a book club for 8 YEARS! There were a core group of 10 women - it grew to about 13 or so at one point. The 10 of us were tight and we meet every 4-6 weeks. Each of us taking turns to host in our home in the various suburbs. Some book conversations were epic, some took 5 min. We celebrated marriages, several births, graduations, new jobs and lost jobs, etc. There is a 24 year age range among the members, too. I still sometimes join the group via Skype if they are meeting in a place where it's feasible to do so. This summer we celebrate 10 years of the book club.

    Oh, I miss those women and those evenings – even though we were all over the map politically, religiously, age wise, and in every other way possible we had such fun together. It’s one of the things I miss most since our move because you’re right – it’s something that makes you feel a part of a community, it gives you something to look forward to and enjoy.

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  9. I wrote a comment but I don't think it posted...

    ANYWAY

    Having the host pick the book is a good idea! Maybe we should try that?

    I'm excited to host...and I'm especially loving the THEME part :)

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  10. I have a book club here in Seattle comprised mostly of bloggers. It's super fun! I tried to put together a book club when I first moved here but we had 15 people and it was hard to manage and so it disbanned. No one really read the book but the hanging out was fun.

    This time around we're small and we read the book and talk about it. But we also just do a lot of girl talking and eating. It's awesome.

    I'd love to be a part of your club- I know some of those bloggers and they are GREAT!

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  11. I just joined one, and it's just starting. Our first book is The Help and we're meeting 5/16.

    I am so, SO excited about it though - I really hopes that it comes into being as something like what you've described here. I really need structured girlfriend time, and the possibility of new girlfriends to spend time with.

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  12. P.S> Middlesex is a really good book.

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  13. Wish I could make that meeting, since I'm reading Middlesex right now. It may be the only time in the history of the world that I am reading a book at the same time as any book club in existence. Alas, the commute is a bit much.

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  14. You're so lucky! I've always wanted to be a part of a book club, having harbored a near-sickening love of books in general, but our community is small and there just aren't a lot of people interested.

    In fact, I think I'm it.

    You've inspired me to hunt down a group somehow or another.

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  15. I loooove that you guys started a bloggers' book club! How cool.

    I've been in the same one for THIRTEEN years. Yes. I haven't read all the comments but is that a record?? We started it in 1997 when most of us were single and although people have moved away, new people have been invited and then embraced, others have moved BACK... it's going strong. I will say that we meet less frequently now (when I see "once a month" in Book Club plans I just smile), but it's one of the most treasured things I do. I don't have a lot of other girlfriends and these have carried me through getting married, having babeis, babies starting school. Could go on and on.

    My only advice is to be open to new people. And not too strict on the rules. Ours is -- you don't have to read the book, but don't get mad if we spoil it for you. :)

    Middlesex is a GREAT discussion book!

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  16. I recently wrote about my book club, so I think you already know how much I love it. While I see various women from the club at various things throughout the month (story time, at the park, having dinner, playgroup, etc.) it is SO GREAT to see them without all of our kids around. I mean, I know and love all of their kids, too, but having time together minus the children is wonderful.

    As many of the other commenters already said, we often don't spend much time on the book. We always talk about it a little, though, and as you said, the conversations NOT about the book are just as good (if not better.)

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  17. I was involved in a great book club until last fall. It was a great mix of girls, some of us knew each other already and we all made some great new friendships. But throughout last year, literally at every meeting, someone announced they were pregnant. I think it was 7 out of 10 of our group got pregnant over the course of several months. CRAZY! They've all since had their babies, some have moved away and we've disbanded. But while it lasted it was awesome. We read all different kinds of books (classics, non-fiction, etc). Our book discussions were great, and there was always a lot of wine, too, which fueled our gossip after the book discussion :-)

    Middlesex is one of the best books I've ever read. I've been wanting to read Elegance of the Hedgehog for awhile...

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  18. i think i would like to join a book club, but don't know if i would love it. i have one in fort collins that reads the book, then gets together at the local independent movie theater and watches a movie related to it.

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  19. I am in a book club, small and internet-less (I don't know how they function) and I really enjoy it.

    Also--I love that you chose "Elegance", it was a charming book and I absolutely loved it.

    xox

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  20. I had an awesome book club I was in while I lived in Denver- we would talk about the book for maybe 30 minutes, eat food that everyone brought, drink a lot of wine, and gossip. I'm jealous that you have also found a great book club as I am missing that here in MA.

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  21. I've always WANTED to be in a book club, but never have been. I've tried doing the online type, but I never stick with it. I think there's something so much nicer about actually meeting in person and sharing snacks and real conversation.

    Maybe one day I'll finally belong to one!

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  22. I've actually never been in a book club despite the fact that I have sort of wanted to participate in one for years. I'm not sure I would actually like the whole talking about the book part though. I *hate* dissecting tv shows or listening to others do it because it ruins the fun & entertainment value of the program for me. Which is the whole entire point. I love to read, but my hesitation is that discussing my thoughts & hearing others thoughts might have the same effect as dissecting tv shows, and take away the pleasure factor. And if the reading part is no longer fun & relaxing it defeats the purpose.

    Plus I've never really felt like I could squeeze it into my schedule anyway. Maybe in the future when I'm not juggling the demands of two work situations & I'm my own boss. We'll see...I love to hear about other people's book club experiences though. So yeah, I'm firmly in the "maybe someday" category!

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  23. Middlesex will CERTAINLY get a conversation going, especially if people differ in political/religious or lifestyle opinions. Should be a good one!

    and Im SOOOOOO jealous, I wish I had a book club to go to!

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  24. I reviewed The Elegance of the Hedgehog on my blog recently and found it quite difficult to pin down my thoughts about it. I would love to have a book group, you're so lucky.

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  25. So fun, I'm glad you found a good group! I'm a book club drop-out, myself.

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  26. I love the concept of book clubs but I've been unable to find a "good" one. I think it's my fault, that I really expect too much of them. The book clubs I've participated in have usually been filled with people I barely know - and this is good in terms of meeting new people, but it's also sort of a pot luck of who you find there, and in terms of getting into reviews and discussions of the books, I will say (as a certifiable book snob, I admit) that most people don't really like to get into the nitty gritty of book discussions.

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  27. I'm in a writing group, and that kind of continuity and support over the years has been AMAZING. But I am dying to find some time to join a reading group too. My MIL and FIL are both in book clubs and always have a blast. They have the -host chooses the book - rule. And my FIL's book club plans the food around the themes of the books, which I think is so cool! I'm hoping I'll get to visit with some reading groups this summer when I travel for my book. (I'll be in Denver for an event in July, actually - so excited!).

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  28. I was in a book club at my last workplace. We met during a lunch break once a month, which didn't work brilliantly because there were usually a few people who couldn't take a full hour's break that day and there weren't that many of us anyway. Plus an hour isn't all that long to have a good discussion. The books chosen were really mixed, which I appreciated, and doing it through work meant one person could buy a bunch of copies through Amazon and distribute them.

    However, I do think a local book group would work much better. There's one that meets at a local pub that I've been meaning to check out. The problem I have these days is fitting in reading another book each month on top of reading for pleasure/my website.

    I definitely agree that finding a local group of people to meet regularly is a great way to start feeling like you belong. TT and I joined a local photography group when we first moved to Bristol and have made some great friends through it. The monthly meets start with camera talk but usually move to drinking and general chitchat pretty quickly.

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  29. I've never been in a book club. While I think it would be fun to discuss the book with friends, I think the pressure to have a book read by a certain time would make it feel like a school assignment.

    I really liked Middlesex. I bought The Elegance of the Hedgehog, so it's on my to read list, and I am curious to read all of Chelsea's books.

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