OK, I'm going to complain about a commercial again. Except this time I'm not REALLY complaining about the commercial, it just made me think of something, so let's try to avoid the kerfluffle that happened last time, shall we?
Have any of you seen that Walmart commercial that's out right now, the one featuring the family playing Monopoly? If not, you can see it here, but also, I'll summarize: the older sister is winning while the younger brother is losing. So, the girl sneaks a hotel off Boardwalk and gives it to her brother while her parents pretend not to notice. The brother quickly sets it up on one of the dark purple properties, the other one of which only has one house.
Ignoring the flagrant rules violation here (you can't have a house on one property and a hotel on another; sets have to be within one house of each other) AND the fact that if she WERE going to give him a hotel, she CERTAINLY would not have taken it off the best property on the board, what kind of bizarre older sister is this?
Because, well, I have some vivid memories of playing Monopoly with my older sister growing up, and I'm pretty sure that she never sneaked a hotel over to me. Maybe the other way around. She was more about conning me into bad deals (Baltic for Boardwalk, anyone?) and then throwing in $100 Monopoly money on top of that to make it seem good. I don't think I won, ever. And she reads this blog, so maybe she can put my suspicions to rest right here, but I'm pretty sure she "borrowed" from the bank on more than one occasion. I'm just saying.
And it's not like I'm angry at her about it now. In fact, I think it's funny. And I'm sure if there had been a sibling younger than me I would have turned around and done the same thing to them. In fact, my sister and I might have ganged up on the mythical third child. It's not like I was angelic--I just couldn't outsmart my sister at Monopoly when I was six and she was nine.
I always just assumed this was standard. I remember a childhood of not being allowed to touch each other while we were riding in the backseat, and bickering over who got to use the bathroom first, and having tricks played on me, and me annoyingly trying to tag along with her friends and being rebuffed. And that wasn't bad. I mean, we definitely got closer as we got older, but we never hated each other. And we're good friends now.
What about you? If you have siblings, what was the relationship like, growing up? And if you have or want kids, what kind of sibling relationship would you like them to have? Are you hoping for the Walmart-commercial ideal, or more of a Beezus and Ramona dynamic?
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LOL! I want to comment first, since after all, I am the topic of this post! but I have to go substitute for our teacher who up and quit, so I don't have time to think back about whether I cheated at Monopoly - my initial reaction is to say no, that I can't recall stealing from the bank, though I am sure I conned you into all sorts of bad trades... but I will ponder the bank "borrowing" bit (such alliteration skills!) and get back to you (and your blog audience, who I'm sure are dying to know!)
ReplyDeleteMy children do both. One time whoever has the advantage is coercing the other into bad trades or giving them "helpful" hints to assure themselves a win and other times like that commercial one or the other (not necessarily because of being older) will do something nice to help the other win. Their dynamic is honestly mostly loving/caring/help the other out.
ReplyDeleteHeh. I'm the youngest of three (my brother is seven years older, and my sister - they're Irish twins - is six years older).
ReplyDeleteAs a child? Oh, no. Not close. At all. I was the pesky little mosquito who followed my sister around and wanted to be just like her. And she wasn't having any of it.
Now? We're super close. But I can think of numerous times my mother threatened to kill us because we fought so viciously once I finally hit my teens. Good times. :-)
I'm 4 years older than my sister, Kay. Growing up, my mother raised us that "she's the only one that will be able to give you a kidney, so be nice to each other". Lol, its a funny way of saying it, and it turns out that I have negative blood and she has positive blood, so in fact, I can't give her a kidney, but you get the idea.
ReplyDeleteDo I allow myself to snap at her more than the average person? Yes. But do I forgive and forget faster with her? You bet.
I wish we lived closer, especially now that we're older, in relationships, and able to relate more on a friend level.
And I never cheated in board games. But I always won. I'm just awesome like that!
I have no siblings, but I've often heard stories from my mom and her siblings regarding Monopoly. Let's just say that it was banned from the house because of the fights that ensued. Imagine that, a family banning Monopoly of all games :)
ReplyDeleteI think it depends more on the personality of the child than anything. I have an older sister and a younger brother. I can GUARANTEE that neither of them would have given me a hotel or anything in Monopoly. (which I hate, btw)They are both very competitive though.
ReplyDeleteI would have given them one, if they would have accepted it. Especially my younger brother. Especially if they were upset. I just don't care about competition or winning that much, so in that situation I'd prefer to see them happy. What can I say, I'm a giver. (sarcasm! lol)
No, but seriously, I think it's personality. Actually, we're just very different people and not all that close now as adults. We talk, we love each other, we're just very different.
For the record: my son, who is eight, would never, ever, ever, ever "sneak" a hotel to his sister in Monopoly. Ever. She might sneak something to him, under duress. But a more likely scenario is the one you describe experiencing growing up--various "deals" in which the younger child gets swindled by the older. Well, it's good for her, right? It will help immunize her from subprime mortgage lenders, perhaps.
ReplyDeleteOff the board, though, they can be impressively loving and helpful. This usually happens when I'm not looking, and it never involves real sacrifice, such as losing a game (god forbid).
My little sister is almost five years younger than I am so you can bet I tricked her often and gave her "hints" that actually only benefited me. But all in all we had a good relationship and we're friends now that we're older. I was not nearly as vicious as some of my male friends were to younger siblings!
ReplyDeleteOh, and I see the same thing in my children. Some of them would totally cheat or lose just to make their sibling happy. Some of them would not.
ReplyDeleteMy sisters and I alternately got along fabulously and fought terribly - partly because we lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one else to bug. We were fairly good about playing games by the rules, although I do recall that the only time I was ever grounded was because we were fighting over whose turn it was to play the Nintendo.
ReplyDeleteNow we get along great, and I get to watch them deal with their kids picking on eachother. ;-)
This is hilarious! We DEFINITELY didn't have the WalMart commercial relationship. We were more likely trying to swipe each other's properties and con the youngers into making bad deals as well.
ReplyDeleteI hope that Madeline someday has a brother or sister to swipe her hotels, because even those Beezus/Ramona relationships grow up into something amazing.
My older brother and sister routinely beat the pants off of me at every single game we ever played growing up and loved every minute of it. That commercial doesn't have any basis in reality, from my experience.
ReplyDeleteWell, although me and my brothers really get along, we never as cheesy as the ones in that monopoly ad. Of course there are times we bug each other too and older siblings usually trick the younger ones from time to time. It's like a sibling rule or something.
ReplyDeleteMy brother is 2 years younger and we got along really, really well, but I wouldn't have sneaked him a house. I would have felt bad for him and would have tried to help, but it would have been more like letting him owe me rent instead of having to forfeit the game, or letting him make a swap that would give him a set of three when it would have been a better game move to keep the third card myself.
ReplyDeleteMy two oldest kids try to trick and cheat each other, and it bothers me a lot. I wish they had more of a "got your back" feeling toward each other, and I hope it develops later. I'm not hoping for sneaking-a-house, though---that seems silly.
My closest sibling is six years younger than me. I spent most of our childhood using him as a living doll or trying to distract him from the game I was playing with my friends. I never tried to pull one over on him though, he was a baby.
ReplyDeleteHowever he and my other two brothers are all within four years of each other...there would be no hotel sneaking. More like bad deals, fights, and "You're cheating!"
There's a huge age gap between me and my siblings. My next oldest brother was nine years older, my sister 10, my other sister 16 years older. So I couldn't relate to them while I was growing up, but now? I am so close to my sister who is 10 years older, I couldn't go a day without talking to her.
ReplyDeletePretty much anything to do with Wal-Mart, including commercials, makes me angry. ha.
ReplyDeleteI have a younger brother. Growing up, our relationship was contentious at best. We've grown up to be incredibly close adults.
If we have kids, we'll only have one. So, I'm not too concerned about what kind of relationship my potential children will have. (Unless we have twins, but let's not go there.)
Oh, Jess! As usual you have hit on another fascinating topic to which many of us can relate. Doubtful that my older brother would have ever done that for me. We were at each other's throats pretty much all our lives until he went away to college.
ReplyDeleteOur relationship was so bad, in fact, that our younger cousins (also older brother, younger sister 2 years apart - 5-7 years younger than me) who adored us saw how bad our relationship was and vowed to each other never to be like that. They still fought occasionally, but I can imagine one of them giving the other a house/hotel, etc. In fact, I once witnessed the younger one sharing her 50% of the candy bar after her brother finished his quicker. Amazing. If I have kids, THAT'S what I want!
My brothers are STILL tramautized when I stuffed them in the sofa once and sat on them. Does that tell you anything? I, on the other hand, am still annoyed that they mooned me and my friends on a regular basis. We laugh about it now.
ReplyDeleteMy kids are 11.5 years apart, though, and my oldest son is SO SWEET to his little brother. It makes my heart melt.
I suspect age difference and dynamics make a huge difference.
I'm the oldest of three (I'm 32, brother is 28, and my sister is 23) and there is NO WAY that the Walmart scenario would have EVER played out in our home. The biggest fights we ever had were over the monopoly board.
ReplyDeleteTo this day, we have to be very careful if we play games together. Rules have to be set out first and we all have to set our competitive nature aside.
Those are some of the best memories I have of children - the bickering. I remember my siblings (3 of them, all older, MUCH older) tying me onto a see-saw that not only went up and down, but also around, then flinging me around and up and down and around and up and down lol. There were plenty of other things they did, which I hated at the time, but now that I look back on them, they really are some great memories of our relationship back then.
ReplyDeleteI'm 3 1/2 years older than my brother, and we fought like cats and dogs one day, and then were best buddies the next (IF he was following MY rules, LOL!). I was definitely a bossy big sister (still am), but I also did want to play together sometimes so I didn't treat him bad all the time, LOL! As a teenager he went through a rough patch and he and I did not get along for awhile, but he's nearly 21 now and he's settled down a lot more, so we're becoming like friends again.
ReplyDeleteOur other brother is 10 years younger than our middle bro (13 years younger than me), so he's like an only child sometimes. He and I are really close because I still live at home, but mostly he just wants to hang out and play video games or watch sports with my boyfriend when he's visiting. It's a different relationship when you're 24 and he's 11! Mostly I'm like another Mom to him, LOL.
I want my kids to get along, but be average siblings, ya know? Hopefully like my bro and I, they can play together and be pals on family trips and such, but I will expect the need for separate activities and separate friends and such to keep the sanity.
I get along well with all my siblings, but we spent our childhoods attempting to kill each other in some form or fashion. I suspect the only reason my brother and I can even speak civilly to each other at this point in our lives is that we both moved out of the same house.
ReplyDeleteI'm the middle sibling with two brothers. My older brother was usually busy with his buddies and when they were all together, I was allowed to tag along but was still teased mercilessly (they called me Stephanerd among other names). My younger brother always tagged along with me and my girlfriends and we teased him mercilessly. It goes both ways.
ReplyDeleteWe never hated each other. Teasing and making fun is just a natural piece of the sibling relationship, I think.
Ok, Hub and I saw that commercial last week, and immediately paused the TV to discuss it. Regardless of the “heroic older sister” implication, the bottom line is that there was cheating involved and we are very big on playing all games fairly. And guess what? If someone is losing, too bad. What values are we teaching our children if we allow them to cheat in order to receive a more favorable outcome. That is not how life works and I don’t want my kids to think they can take the easy way out. In my opinion, we’d be setting them up for failure.
ReplyDeleteI realize “it’s just a game”, but honestly, if a child gets their way or is cut a break any time they are behind, they’re going to expect it for life.
This is not to mention that being an older sister myself, no way in HELLZ would I give my brother a hotel to help him get ahead in a game. Hell to the no.
Hmmm... on a weekly (almost) basis I find myself staying up way past my bedtime in order to have the highest bejeweled score of the week and I only play against my mother, siblings, nieces and nephews... Does that tell you whether I would have let them win as a child?????
ReplyDeleteMy brother would have taken a house for the sole purpose of shoving it up my nose. There is no chance on God's green earth that he would have ever, EVER, helped me win, nor me him. I would like to hope that someday Bub is kind enough to protect his little sister's feelings, but I imagine he'll be more of the Baltic for Boardwalk kind of kid!
ReplyDeleteI was an only child and loved it. I wanted a big sister for awhile, but clearly that was not going to happen. I often wonder what I missed out on, but then I know so many people that can't stand their siblings that I'm glad it was just me.
ReplyDeleteI'm one of ten children. We had epic board and card games and could always grab a couple of neighbourhood kids for a six on six game of something outdoors.
ReplyDeleteOf course the usual things happened just as you described. My older brother used to get us to do his dishes for 5 cents and when we wanted to get out of ours, he charged us 50c (where 50c was enough for three iceblocks and 75 lollies lol). Our older brother and sister got us to invest our pocket money into a tin in the ceiling then stole it as soon as we forgot about it lol.
My big sisters rarely let me join in when they had friends over but we're great friends now. My parents were instrumental in teaching us we must love and be kind to one another. Here's how:
If we were caught/told on for saying something mean to one another, the person who had said the mean thing had to stand face to face to the person they said it about then they had to say five things that they loved and appreciated about you (and it wasnt allowed to be physical characteristics). Soon taught us to not be mean, it's HARD to say five nice things about someone you're actually annoyed at in the first place!
I'd comment but I didn't have the "normal" growing up together relationship with my brothers that a lot of people have with siblings. My older brothers lived with their Mom so I only got to see them for a couple of weeks a year when they'd come up to spend time with our Dad (until they got too old) so 100% of my childhood memories of sibling time are positive because we were novelties to each other.
ReplyDeleteThough I did once make them very angry once when I got Prince and Michael Jackson confused (I was 6, they were 13 and 15). :)
Yeah, I would never have helped out my sister when we were younger.... Especially when doing something competitive!
ReplyDeleteme and my older bro used to play monopoly a lot - he would routinely drive me into bankruptcy, and then allow me buy my way out with actual belongings, which he would not return after the game. i think taking advantage of the younger ones is integral to the sibling relationship. granted he also looked out for me a bit, though he wouldn't have admitted it at the time. we hated each other - tried to harm each other. i've pushed him down staircases, he's held me under water longer than one ought.
ReplyDeletenow he is easily one of my favorite people on the planet.
I wouldn't have done that but I do remember letting my younger sisters off rent very cheaply, or giving them good deals on swapping properties. And we usually gave them more money to start with. It made it more fun for them - they didn't always lose, and more fun for me - it wasn't a total walkover every time.
ReplyDeleteMy sister and I have always been close, like best friends, and hardly fought. Things are different now that we are older and I miss that closeness we once had. I think we can get it back but it will take work.
ReplyDeleteLol, games at our house growing up usually resulted in someone not talking to someone else (I was usually involved). There would be no sneaking to help out, definitely not!
ReplyDeleteThere was a Thanksgiving when I swept all the tiles off the scrabble board because I thought my brother played a fake (72 point) word. Haven't lived that one down yet.
Ha! Beezus and Ramona ALL THE WAY. You can love each other while still being normal competitive children. I'm fourth of nine, so I can say I both stole and got robbed. Well, I guess I never tricked my youngest siblings (when they're like, 10+ years younger, I'd feel terrible!).
ReplyDelete