Sometimes it amazes me how fast time accumulates. I've been here thinking that I've been in DC for a year or so, and then slowly I started to realize that I've been here a good two years--and while I was busy thinking that, it crept up to two and a half. By employment standards, I have three years of experience. I am well beyond entry level. I have a career.
Sometimes when I'm at work I find myself overcome with a wave of missing Torsten, even if I'm chatting with him at the time, even though I know he's just ten blocks down the street from me at his own office.
Sometimes I want to cut off all my hair, or give myself ridiculous trendy bangs that curly hair like mine could never pull off. And sometimes I want to grow out my hair and have long, glorious curls, even though I know it would look less Season Six Carrie and more Puffy Poodle Gone Wrong.
Sometimes I want to sit down with Torsten and start the process of naming our future child. Not just occasionally tossing around names that cross our minds, but really sitting down, making lists, hashing it out, writing to Swistle for advice and feedback. I want to pick a boy name and a girl name and know them and keep them for ourselves, our own delicious secret that we can roll around in our heads and mouths whenever we want.
Sometimes I want to take an unplanned day off work so I can stay in our comfy bed under our soft, puffy down comforter and not have to move until I bloody well feel like it. And then get up and go to the gym while The Price Is Right is on. Even though Drew Carey is no Bob Barker.
Sometimes I want a dog so badly that I start looking at shelter and adoption group websites and thinking about breeds, age, etc. And then I see the pictures of the dogs that need homes and realize that going to those websites was a bad, bad idea.
Sometimes I want to take control of everything to make sure that it happens exactly the way I want it to. And sometimes I am totally fine not being involved at all and letting the chips fall where they may.
What goes through your head sometimes?
New Recipe: Greek Penne Pasta
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This recipe sounded delicious to me when I came across it, and it turned
out that it was. Also, I've reached the point with cooking where I can make
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14 years ago
I'm actually dying for bangs too...except they will never work for me, my forehead is too small. I could kill for a 5head, just so I could have super cute bangs.
ReplyDeleteI totally feel you on missing the SO even when they're so close. I call my "I super love you days". I had one yesterday actually :) When I got home I wouldn't stop hugging my husband. :)
ReplyDeletei want to do something totally different to my hair but i don't know what to do and i'm scared it will look terrible. i wonder if we'll ever get pregnant or if all the treatment we're doing and money we're spending is just a waste. and i also would love to take a day off work just for the hell of it and stay in bed all day. that's such a happy thought :)
ReplyDeleteI have the same issues... I think we all do! Its good that we still miss them even when we just saw them, and its good to think of the future, even if it is "far away". And I finally did the bangs, and they are an adjustment! That's for sure :)
ReplyDeleteI have never missed someone I see every day. I'll add that to the growing list of ways people apparently know they've found "The One."
ReplyDeleteDitto. I want to start a family and watch my husband become a dad. But I also want to just stop...and breathe...and have NO responsibilities for awhile.
ReplyDeleteI am taking off Friday- I plan to lay in bed as long as I bloody well please ... then I'll take myself to s lovely tea room for a girly lunch. Then I'll go to the library and get some new good reads ... then I plan to go to Massage Envy and get my monthly massage ... then I will go home and when Conrad gets home and asks me what I did on my day off, I'll tell him "nothing" . :)
ReplyDeleteI am taking off Friday- I plan to lay in bed as long as I bloody well please ... then I'll take myself to s lovely tea room for a girly lunch. Then I'll go to the library and get some new good reads ... then I plan to go to Massage Envy and get my monthly massage ... then I will go home and when Conrad gets home and asks me what I did on my day off, I'll tell him "nothing" . :)
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking about growing my hair out or cutting it too. But it's SO thick and wavy/curly and nothing seems to work. Ack! I need it cut or maybe thinned. Or maybe to find a stylist who knows something and give my hair over to their mercy. *sigh*
ReplyDeletehmm... Sometimes I think I should just be a bit more brave and do the things I want to do instead of being scared of it.
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking about how I'm turning 30 in about a month and how I really don't want to.
ReplyDeleteDOG DOG DOG. ME WANT DOG. So that explains the whole "Sassy Kay" thing.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I think about having another baby, and sometimes I think it would be nice to have the caboose of the train in sight.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I think about cutting bangs. Sometimes I think about going a Manic Panic color.
Sometimes I think about moving to a big huge house. Sometimes I think about how perfect this house will be for just me and Paul when the kids leave home.
Lady, I have the bangs and they are not all they're cracked up to be. And sometimes, I miss Chris even when he's in the same room, if I can tell he's far away in his mind.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I can't wait to move back to Texas and other times I love New York so much I could never imagine myself anywhere else.
ReplyDeleteOh boy, the dog thing. Am I ever with you! The websites make me cry, so I've taken to ONLY looking at the SFSPCA dogs because they're such an active no-kill shelter.
ReplyDeleteI love these kinds of posts. Sometimes I really, really, really want a totally anonymous blog and then I wonder what it says about me that I'd share some things with strangers, but not with my friends.
I sometimes think "I want to get married!" ..and something I think the opposite. Why? What will it change?
ReplyDeleteSometimes I want to scream at the parents of my teenage clients.. "YOU'RE MESSING UP YOUR KID!" ..but they don't tend to take that very well.
Ahhh that inner voice is strong. :)
Sometimes I totally think we're the same person.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I can't believe how fast time accumulates, either! This is something I think about a lot. It seemed like each year in school was an eternity, and each year had its own special character. Then, all of a sudden over six years have gone buy since I've graduated from high school and it all seems like a blur. I try really, really hard to enjoy the moment and not to take anything for granted. I figure, if I can enjoy right now, instead of always longing for tomorrow, time might just go by a little bit more slowly.
ReplyDeleteOf late I think a lot about the details of our lives, like picking out new paint colors and finding a renter, and getting a new job. And honestly but for this post I wouldn't have realized I don't think about anything else.
ReplyDeletei obsess about whether or not i want bangs. my forehead NEEDS bangs, but my hair is VERY BAD for bangs. i just don't know. AUGH.
ReplyDeletesometimes i wonder if i should stay in columbus. i like it here but miss my family tons.
ReplyDeletesometimes i think about what it'll be like to be a stay at home mom and not work in an office 9-5. i hope someday i will be able to find out.
Sometimes I want to tell my boss what I raelly think and quit.
ReplyDeleteSometimes, I want to move to a different city. We're actually discussing that one.
And I am with you on staying at home in bed!
I really like this post.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I want to pack up the car with the husband and kids and just drive drive drive. Turn our phones off, put on some music, and drive.
just say no to the bangs, curly girl. i did that one 4 months ago...no.no.no. You either have to spend 20 minutes each morning with the Chi or deal with the curls in your eyes. our lot in life is hard!
ReplyDeleteand doggies...I got my Lucy from a breed-specific rescue group, and it was the best thing EVER. i selfishly really wanted a basset hound, but also wanted to rescue. Ms. Lucy-dog was found wandering alone in the rain in an empty field, skinny and scared. Now she's 15 lbs. heavier and snoring on my lap. :) I applaud you for considering rescue instead of a breeder!!!
wow, that's a lot of annoying random advice. :) lately, all i can think of is that in 1 year, the bar exam will be over & i'll be working...
I am like, melted by how sweetly in love you are with Torsten. It is so, so inspiring.
ReplyDeleteI think about all kinds of things, like how some of my students passed their pre-reqs, how to best engage them in a lesson on X, whether this guy will call, whether I should IM that guy, and what to wear. Which book I should read next, what I'll be doing in a year, where I should go next, how I should spend my money. So yeah, similar to everyone I guess.
I totally look at dog shelter websites too! Then I usually email my fiance the cutest ones and he politely says no.
ReplyDeleteI too get the intense pangs of missing. I wonder about the bangs. I also wonder what I would do if I freed myself to just quit my job-what then?
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I actually did come up with one baby name while we were still engaged back in 2004 - Madeline Grace. She's here now. :) It's really fun to remember coming up with her name... it's like we knew she'd be first.
What goes through my mind. Lots. I should write a blog post about this. Sometimes its the image of me being a mother. Holding a little boy in my arms. Sometimes its having another adventure. Sometimes its lying next to a guy whom I adore and not having to say a single word. Then there are the depressing thought, the ones that get me crying. Nice post.
ReplyDeleteNot quite the same kind of thoughts, but I posted on this at my blog.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the prompt!
Sometimes, I want to shave my head...
ReplyDeleteSometimes I want to dye my hair pink like Gwen Stefani in the earlier years...
Sometimes I wish I didn't worry about the silly stuff, kids definitely has put things in perspective. And I am better about that now.