tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post6150453916034852235..comments2024-03-26T04:27:54.485-06:00Comments on Du Wax Loolu: Adoption and racial subculturesJesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15942269316108576622noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-68338636953283117982007-10-15T18:14:00.000-06:002007-10-15T18:14:00.000-06:00It would be worthwhile to consider adopting two ch...It would be worthwhile to consider adopting two children from the same culture - possibly even a pair of siblings. One blog I enjoy is Owlhaven - she has ten kids, six of whom are adopted: two Korean boys, two Ethiopian girls, and now most recently two sisters from Ethiopia. She seems to have put a lot of effort into ensuring that nobody is the odd man out in her family - everyone has someone with whom to share a cultural background (and I know she makes lots of efforts to incorporate Asian and Ethiopian cuisine into their life as well).Beahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15957626443087438904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-83650579169606627912007-10-15T06:49:00.000-06:002007-10-15T06:49:00.000-06:00The fact that you are already aware fo the complic...The fact that you are already aware fo the complications and issue is a wonderful sign that you'll be able to be supportive to any child that come along...black, white or whatever.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-26443131566841615722007-10-14T12:01:00.000-06:002007-10-14T12:01:00.000-06:00That's a lot of thoughts for something that is sti...That's a lot of thoughts for something that is still a few (several) years away. Good thoughts, though.<BR/><BR/>As I have no experience with adoption or mixed-racial families, I can't add any helpful anecdotes. But I bet that there are books and online resources out there that would help, and also, I think the process of adoption will expose you to some new information and thoughts along the way.Pennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02864909952004392637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-23771369791757860222007-10-13T14:11:00.000-06:002007-10-13T14:11:00.000-06:00Giving children the tools they need to navigate re...Giving children the tools they need to navigate reality is the ultimate task of all parents. If anybody can do it with grace, you can.Erinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05170500094049647497noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-85981205001766881902007-10-13T09:25:00.000-06:002007-10-13T09:25:00.000-06:00I have only two things to add, and perhaps neither...I have only two things to add, and perhaps neither are relevant.<BR/><BR/>1) I heard something about foreign adoptions that stuck with me: Adopt a child from a country you love.<BR/><BR/>2) The west coast is a really good place to live for mixed families. When we lived there, I knew a white couple in their late forties who adopted a black infant, and she was trying to breastfeed him too, and no one even BLINKED.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-21489279692435565902007-10-12T18:52:00.000-06:002007-10-12T18:52:00.000-06:00Kudos for tackling this issue in a blog. And I th...Kudos for tackling this issue in a blog. And I think you're definitely in the right mindset to be able to pull it of. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for your encouragement on my post. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-8917270101062679362007-10-12T15:38:00.000-06:002007-10-12T15:38:00.000-06:00There is a blog called Fully Operational Battle St...There is a blog called <A HREF="http://www.fullyoperationalbattlestation.com/" REL="nofollow">Fully Operational Battle Station</A> whose author is in the process of adopting two children from Ethiopia. She has links to other blogs by adoptive parents in her left-hand sidebar. AND it's a fun blog to read, too.emailhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03653316423608779303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-49004740184310818402007-10-12T15:01:00.000-06:002007-10-12T15:01:00.000-06:00I don't know if you read Lawerish, but she is in t...I don't know if you read Lawerish, but she is in the process of adopting a Vietnamese child. Maybe she has something interesting on this whole issue.<BR/><BR/>It's interesting, though, because while everyone knows that things are mostly the way you described, no one wants to think about that. Just because someone is of any certain race, that they will be drawn to others of their own race. And its not due to racism or hatred, but a mutual understanding of culture and comfort. Though I wonder if growing up in a house where a black child only knows their adopted white parents, if they are more likely to find that they have more in common with other white kids.<BR/>This is so not a subject that i would ever be comfortable broaching on the internet or in real life. Good for you for asking questions..clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00251854992291809671noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-31596825969895352172007-10-12T14:10:00.000-06:002007-10-12T14:10:00.000-06:00I think that just knowing, which you already do, t...I think that just knowing, which you already do, that you'll never be fully prepared for this stuff is probably the exact right attitude to have. Also, talking to people who have done it, or are doing it . . . do you know anyone who has adopted outside the U.S.?Flibbertyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14814796033630554918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-77429538222214468562007-10-12T14:07:00.000-06:002007-10-12T14:07:00.000-06:00Just the fact that you are planning to adopt is gr...Just the fact that you are planning to adopt is great! Considering all the implications of differing cultures and wanting to address those issues is... thoughtful isn't the right word, but at the moment I can't come up with a better one. Anyway, there are other adoptive parents facing the same issues, and there are probably organizations of these parents that can provide a lot of insight.emailhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03653316423608779303noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-88579601402393224162007-10-12T11:50:00.000-06:002007-10-12T11:50:00.000-06:00I think that you are doing the absolute best thing...I think that you are doing the absolute best thing you can, and that is to be aware of these issues and do your best to educate yourself. Your (future) child is lucky to have such a smart and forward thinking mom.Bananahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01448587729307622629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2119996845182958780.post-79469934748062541582007-10-12T10:47:00.000-06:002007-10-12T10:47:00.000-06:00Well, hell. I think you are off to an outstanding...Well, hell. I think you are off to an outstanding start because you are thinking of all this complicated, difficult, uncomfortable stuff now. You are already a good parent!<BR/><BR/>I doubt you'll ever feel like you have any real answers to this stuff. But I have a feeling you guys will always step back, examine what is presently going on in your and your child's life from a thoughtful distance, and dive back into it with the wisdom that comes from that distance and time.<BR/><BR/>My first thought was to read some feminist writings. IMHO (look at me using acronyms!!) good feminist thinking is about completely re-evaluating any and all forms of dominations and submission and re-imagining a world outside of those systems. (I don't think good feminist thinking should just focus on "womens' issues.") <BR/><BR/>There could be some interesting ways of re-framing these cultural systems you talk about, and thus give you new potential answers to explore.artemisiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12048259618106957687noreply@blogger.com